May 2000

Writer: Nick Bryan

Buffy	Xander	Willow	Giles
Spike	Riley	Anya	Walsh
Oz

Buffy strolled over the college grounds. It had been quite a quiet few days, and she had decided to go see Xander. It had been ages since they’d had a conversation without Anya or Spike or someone similar hovering in the background. As she approached the Harris’s house, walking past the tarpaulin that was covering the huge hole in the wall of Xander’s basement, she heard someone coming down the stairs to the basement, and saw their shadow through the tarp collapsing into a chair. She idly wondered if Anya and Xander would be quite so keen to copulate madly if they knew their shadows were quite visible to all visitors. She noted to mention this to him. She pushed the tarp aside and entered. Xander looked up from sitting slumped in the chair.

"Oh, hey Buff. What brings you to my humble hole?"

"Just felt like visiting," she sat on the bed, "What’s up?"

"Oh, here’s a funny story Buffy. You’ll love this. You remember the commandos blasted a hole in my wall during that gun spell thingy?"

"Yeah. What about it?"

"Well, after my mom got back, she decided that she doesn’t like having large holes blown in her walls."

Buffy looked towards the hole. "So she’s making you pay for it?"

"No, it gets better. She wants a tenant with less of a habit of attracting large demons."

"You mean......"

"Oh yeah. I’m being evicted by my mother." And Xander let his head fall forwards into his knees.

"WHAT?"

"You heard."

Buffy was somewhat surprised by this. "Wow. So where are you gonna live?"

"Not a clue. Maybe I should just get a vamp to turn me into one of the undead. Then at least I get my own spot in the sewers."

"Oh, don’t worry Xander. I’ll think of something."

Xander looked up at her with one eye. "Don’t you have something to slay?"

She looked down at the floor. "Yeah. I guess I should.........um..... yeah. I’ll get going. See you later."

She left the basement and started walking back to her dorm. As she did this, she was set upon by a stray vampire. She staked it without a second thought.

Meanwhile, not too far away, a half-demon being was preparing for battle. He was choosing his weaponry and preparing to venture out into the world to fight. He was planning to kill tonight, simply to satisfy his violent urges. He had little regard for the creatures he hunted. This creature was called Spike.

Another supernaturally blessed creature was entering Sunnydale in preparation for a confrontation tonight. He was driving his van up a highway to Sunnydale. He had left this town under difficult circumstances, but he was hoping for a reconciliation. And if he didn’t get it, then maybe he would just leave again. This time for good.

He was having more or less the same thoughts when he pulled the van up in front of a house in lower Sunnydale. He knocked a few times. He heard something inside, so he knocked again. Eventually, after he realised his visitor wasn’t going away, Devon opened the door. And then he smiled. "OZ! You’re back! Where’ve you been?"

Oz raised his eyebrows. "Here and there. We got a gig tonight?"

"Yeah! Let me just call and kick the replacement guitarist out!"

"Thanks."

Oz came into Devon’s place, which he shared with a few others and sat down. He had decided that he should try and get back to normal. Then he couldn’t stop himself thinking of Willow.

Buffy The Vampire Slayer

Episode Two:

"The Middle Ground"

Featuring:
Sarah Michelle Gellar
Nicholas Brendon
Alyson Hannigan
James Marsters
Emma Caulfield
Marc Blucas
AND Anthony Stewart Head as Giles

GUEST STARRING Seth Green as Oz

Buffy arrived back at the dorm. Willow was looking for something. As Buffy entered, she tried to hide how frantically she was looking for it.

"Oh, hey Buffy."

"Hey Wil. Looking flustered. What’s up?"

"Oh, you haven’t seen a photo by any chance have you?"

"This would be a photo of Oz for you to mope over?"

"Well...."

"It’s there." As she said this, Buffy picked up the phone and dialled. She waited for it to be picked up. "Hello? Anya? Buffy. Yeah. I think Xander needs to see you." She paused and listened. "Go and find out. Just don’t tell him I sent you. Okay. Seeya."

She hung up the phone and looked round. Willow was sitting on her bed looking at the photo with the hint of a tear forming in her eye. Buffy lay back on her bed and sighed. This had not been a good start to the week.

Giles was having a somewhat odd evening. He had come back from his dinner with Olivia, since she had "places to be", and couldn’t come back with him, and found that Spike had decided to turn his main room into an armoury.

"Spike, what are you doing?"

"Just choosing my weaponry."

"Where did you get all this?"

"Oh, most of it’s yours."

"You stole my weapons?"

"I’m just borrowing them actually. After you kept me tied to that bloody chair for weeks, I’m thinking this is the least you could do."

Giles decided to change the subject. "Okay, so what do you want my weapons for?"

"Well, y’know how I can hurt demons, but not humans?"

"Yes."

"I’m going demon-hunting."

Giles groaned, and decided it might be worthwhile to sit down.

Spike strapped a crossbow to his shoulder, added a small gun that Xander had obtained for Giles using his army connections, and went to leave.

"See you."

Giles waved and shook his head sadly.

Buffy woke up the next morning to a loud noise from her clock-radio. She jabbed the "Snooze" button with expert precision and rolled over. She looked over at Willow, who was still asleep and clutching the photo of Oz as if her life depended on it. As Buffy went over to the shower, she put a hand on Willow’s shoulder and shook her gently.

"Wil......Wil.......time to get up now."

She woke with a start. "OZ!"

"Well, sorry to disappoint you Will, but I’m not Oz. Now, we need to get ready to go to school."

"Sure." And Willow lay down and went back to sleep.

Meanwhile, Giles was also having an interesting waking experience. He woke up, then absent-mindedly walked through the living room to the shower. He went back similarly. He finally put his glasses on as he entered to make breakfast. He had gotten all the way to the kitchen when he noticed it.

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL....????"

Spike jumped out of his sleep and off the sofa. "WHAT?!"

"Spike, what have you done?"

Then Spike realised what he meant. "Oh, that. It’s a demon corpse. My first kill. Pretty good isn’t it?"

The rather large demon’s body covered a lot of the centre of the room.

"You can’t leave it there. It’ll start to smell."

"True. Mind you, I used to live in graveyards, so I’m used to the stench of death."

"How interesting. I’m not. Just move it."

"Oh, fine, be like that."

So Spike went over to move the corpse. He started chopping it into little bits with Giles’ meat-cleaver.

"Must you use my cutlery?"

"Yes."

Before Giles could reply to that, there was a knock at the door.

"Who is it at this hour?" Giles muttered.

"If it’s a giant and really pissed off chaos demon, it’s for me. I didn’t quite manage to kill that." Spike announced, looking up briefly from his cutting.

It was Xander.

"Giles, hi."

"Xander, how wonderful. What do you want?"

"Well, I just....Why is Spike performing demonic autopsies on your floor?"

"Well, I......." Spike prepared to announce his achievement, but was interrupted by Giles.

"Quiet Spike. Because he is, Xander. I’m not entirely sure myself."

"Fine. Right, I’ll ignore him and get to the point. I’m getting evicted from my basement. I need somewhere to live."

"And you want me to pay for a newspaper so you can read the adverts."

"Actually, I was kinda wondering if I could move in here."

Giles raised his eyebrows. Spike immediately looked up like a shot.

"Hey! I was here first!"

"But you’re evil!" Xander complained.

"So? Finders keeper, losers Xanders."

"I warn you, I’m a close personal friend of the slayer..."

"SHUT UP BOTH OF YOU!"

Xander and Spike looked at Giles. "Right. Xander, evil though he may be, Spike does have a point. However, you could use the guest room. Spike can continue to stay on the sofa."

"You never told me there was a guest room!" Spike protested.

"Well, that’s because I didn’t want you sleeping in it."

"Fair enough"

As he said this, Spike got back his dissection. Xander thanked Giles loudly and explicitly, just so Spike would overhear.

As Buffy strode into her tutorial, dragging a semi-conscious Willow behind her, Riley came up to them.

"Morning girls."

"Hi Riley." Buffy smiled charmingly.

Willow managed a couple of "uh"s.

As Willow stumbled to her seat, tripping over other students as she went, Riley leant against a wall and chatted to Buffy.

"So, didn’t see you at The Bronze last night."

"No, sorry. I was talking to Xander."

"Oh. Well, you would have liked it. This band was playing. You would have liked them."

"Who’s that?"

"Dingos Ate My Baby."

"Yeah, they’re pretty cool. How they doing with the new lead guitar?"

"What new lead? They’ve still got the same one. Osbourne or something."

Buffy nearly choked on her own phlegm.

Deciding to ignore this to leave Buffy some amount of dignity, Riley continued with what he was saying.

"They had a new one for a bit, but he’s back now." He paused and thought for a minute. As he did this, he caught sight of Willow asleep at her desk.

"Hey, wasn’t Willow and him........"

"Oh yeah."

Riley and Buffy were both quiet for a few seconds. Then Professor Walsh called him over.

"Riley! Could you come and discuss some matters regarding today’s class?"

"Sure!" He called back. Then he turned back to Buffy. "Seeya later."

"Yeah..." Buffy barely acknowledged him as she went back to her desk. She noticed Willow was asleep, and absent mindedly hit her to wake her up, not acknowledging how much of her strength she was using.

"YEOW! What did I do, Buffy?"

Buffy snapped out of it. "Sorry Wil. Just heard something weird, that’s all."

The sun was beginning to set. Back in Giles’ apartment, Spike was asleep. Xander was reading on the sofa. Then the clock radio next to Spike sounded. He woke with a start.

"HEY!"

"Morning Spike."

"Evening. Where’s my demon body parts?"

"In that bag."

"Thanks." Spike picked up the bag and went to leave. Then the door opened and Buffy entered, followed by Anya.

"Slayer. Nice to see you. Bye."

"Sit, Spike. This won’t take long."

Spike went to push her out of the way, but was intercepted by the unbearable pain in his head. So he sat down.

Anya went straight over to Xander.

"Hello Xander."

"Anya. How’re you...."

Then she kissed him, and as they started to lean back, Buffy yelled to them.

"GUYS! Not yet!"

"And not while I’m in the room" added Spike

Giles added "And not on my sofa."

"Spoil my fun" muttered Anya.

"Fine, okay. I just......Spike, why do you have a bag full of demonic body parts?"

"I’ve taken up demonic bounty hunting."

"Really. Interesting. Anyway, there’s been a reported Oz sighting at the Bronze."

Everyone was shocked. "WHAT?"

"I thought he left!"

"What will Willow say?"

"Can I go now, this is really dull and has nothing to do with me."

"I just think we should stop talking about it."

Buffy sighed. Giles took it upon himself to impose order. "Spike, Anya, I appreciate it’s not a subject you care much for, but I’m afraid the rest of us do."

"So can I just go then?"

Buffy relented. "Yes Spike. And you too if you like Anya."

"No, I wanna have sex." Anya decided after quick contemplation.

"I’m always available," Spike added as he left the flat.

"So, I’m going to check it out. Just thought I let you know about the sighting of our favourite were....."

"Hi Willow!" added Xander quickly.

"Were................the hell is my stake? I need to slay vampires!" Buffy quickly amended, before turning around to greet Willow.

Willow quickly said "Hi" to the others, then turned to Buffy.

"Buffy, have you seen Amy? I’ve been looking for her, but I think she’s just gone bampf into thin air."

"Sorry Wil. No Amy here. I’m going to go meet Riley at the Bronze. Seeya."

She left, and as Willow turned to the others to talk, Anya slumped back in desperation.

Buffy heard the music as she approached the Bronze. Buffy opened the back door and entered. The Dingos were warming up for their performance tonight. She recognised the song. It was one of Willow’s favourites. Then she saw them. Oz was there, large as life, not looking especially concerned about being found. But then Oz didn’t make a habit of looking concerned. As they finished the song and went towards the bar for drinks, Buffy caught up with Oz.

"Oz. Nice to see you again."

Oz showed no surprise at seeing Buffy again. "Does Willow know I’m back?"

"No"

They started to walk to the bar, when Riley came over.

Spike strolled along a street carrying the bag of demonic body-parts over his shoulder. He looked down at the piece of paper in his hand. He looked up again. Satisfied that this was the correct house. He knocked. The man who came to the door was in his thirties, and quite drunk at this particular time.

"Hi. I’m Spike. I’ve dismembered this demon for you. Can I have some money?"

The man looked in the bag, and smiled. "Come in."

Riley grabbed Buffy’s arm. "Buffy."

She turned. "Oh, hi Riley."

"So. You said you weren’t coming here."

"Yeah. Last minute change of mind."

"Oh right. You wouldn’t have just blown me off because you don’t want to see me then?"

"No. Really. No blowing off of any kind here."

"Look, Buffy, if you don’t like me....."

"Riley, I...I don’t...........I just...."

"Fine. Point taken."

He walked off into the crowd.

Buffy looked back at Oz. He looked up from sipping his drink. "Boyfriend?"

"No. Maybe. Don’t know. Shut up."

"Okay."

"Right......Now, what to do. Willow’s problems......my problems.......Willow.....me. Willow. Me."

"Look, just go after him. My problem will keep."

"Just as long as you will."

She looked at him pointedly. He smiled slightly. "Trust me."

"Okay. Want me to tell Willow you’re back?"

"No, I’ll do it. Later. At your place."

"Fine."

Buffy raced off after Riley.

Spike counted the money.

"No bad. Smells a bit, but not bad."

The man paying him smirked. "They say money smells good."

"Yours doesn’t."

The man stopped smirking. "Thanks for whacking that demon anyway. Killed my wife a while back. I owe the bastard some payback."

"Well, now you can play with his body parts until the cows come home, mate."

And Spike got up to leave.

"Nice doing business with you."

Without waiting for a response, Spike got up to leave. As he strode out of the house, he pulled out his list of demons to hunt. He still had to leave some time to go shopping with his new money after getting in a quick kill. The list had the demon listed down one side, what it was, and how much it cost. Spike absentmindedly strolled down the street, trying to work out how he could get the most money for the least effort.

Meanwhile, a large and very pissed off chaos demon with a bleeding wound in his side watched him from afar. And licked its lips.

Anya was still slumped back, as Willow and Xander talked at length about Willow’s problems. Sitting at this close proximity to Xander, with his hand on hers, but completely unable to do anything was driving her insane. She decided she’d tolerated enough. She’d put up with this for around three minutes.

"Xander, are we actually going to have sex, or are you going to continue running on about Oz all night?"

"Anya, this is kinda......"

"Repetitive?" Anya offered.

"True, but not the response I was looking for..."

"So I’m repetitive?" Willow inquired.

"No, Wil, I didn’t...."

"Forget it." Willow got up and went to the door. "Seeya Giles."

"Bye Willow."

As she left, Giles turned to Xander.

"Well done Xander. While you’re living here, do me a favour and never answer the phone."

Giles went to get coffee. Xander turned to Anya.

"Well done. Top points."

"Great. Now they’ve gone, can we have sex?"

As Xander tried to remember what his teachers had said about the glory about the word "N-O", Anya was already leading him to the bedroom.

Buffy pushed through the crowds and finally caught up with Riley.

"Riley! Wait!"

Riley turned to her with a look of mild impatience.

"You’ve got to understand, I was just helping Willow..."

Riley rolled his eyes. "Buffy, you’ve got to stop..."

Then Buffy saw Willow walk in. And she had a train of thoughts that ran "Willow. Oz. Uh-oh."

She went over to her. "Wil, what are you doing here?"

"Just came to see you. Is Riley here?"

"Yeah, he’s just over there."

"Oh. You guys busy?"

"Well, a little, but..."

Willow cut in. "Is this the Dingos?"

"Yeah. With their new guitarist. Who isn’t Oz. Did I mention he isn’t Oz?"

"Yeah, I get your point Buffy. I have to move on. I don’t think I really can hear these songs though. I’m gonna get going."

"Okay. Bye. See you back home."

As Willow left, Riley came over.

Spike was just heading to the blood bank to spend his evening’s earnings, when something unexpected occurred. It occurred rather violently onto Spike’s head from a tree. It was a large and very pissed off chaos demon.

Spike had recently discovered that he can hurt demons. But he still wasn’t going to try and hit this one. He ran. He knew where he was going, he just wasn’t sure if he’d get there.

Riley and Buffy sat down at a table.

"Buffy," Riley began, "I don’t blame you for not telling me you were here. I know you came here to help Willow."

"So what’s up?"

"It’s just.........you’re always doing this. Kind of mediating. Being the middle ground in other people’s arguments is only good for so long. You have to leave it be sometimes. I’m sure Oz and Willow could have sorted themselves out."

"I know, I just thought I should............."

Buffy leant on one arm and was about to try and plead her case, when there was a noise from outside. Then a window caved in. Through it fell two demons.

Spike scrambled away from the demon as they smashed into the Bronze and looked around for the Slayer. He saw her and ran in her direction as the demon started to get up.

Riley tried to lose himself in the crowd so he could call the Initiative in. Buffy didn’t follow him, and he at least found a dark corner to use his radio.

"This is Agent Finn. We have a situation at the Bronze. Anyone receiving?"

Professor Walsh pressed the button on her mike. "Receiving, Riley. What is it?"

"Large demon. Need restraining force. Civilians in danger."

Maggie looked at the pictures coming in from Riley’s cameras. "The Slayer," she muttered. Then she talked to him again. "Right. Try and get everyone out. Don’t compromise yourself unless you have to. We’ll send some people."

The club was nearly empty now. Only Buffy and Spike remained, with their playmate. The demon charged at Spike, only to have a chair leg embedded in its back by the Slayer.

It tried to backhand her away, but she dodged past his arm, grabbed Spike and headed backstage.

"Riley was right," she muttered, "I have to get away from other people’s problems."

Then she spoke to Spike. "So what is it?"

"A demon I tried to kill for a bounty. I didn’t manage it. I think its pissed at me."

"Really." Buffy leapt for the high ground, closely followed by Spike.

"Any idea how we kill it?"

"Well, I tried violence. That didn’t work. Maybe you should bomb it."

"Do I look like I’m covered in explosives?"

Spike contemplated this. "Maybe...."

"Don’t even bother, Spike. We need a tactic."

"Cry?"

"I’ll leave that to you."

Then the demon began to shake the lighting rig they were balanced on. They had to leap clear as it fell to the floor. As the demon advanced towards them, Spike pulled out the gun he had stolen from Giles and open fire on the creature. The bullets penetrated its skin and it cried out in pain. As Buffy and Spike took advantage of the respite to run, more bullets hit the demon. These were fired by the Initiative force entering the Bronze.

"The commandos. Great."

Buffy watched as they flanked the demon for an attack.

Suddenly, large bone claws popped from the demon’s hands. It used these to disembowel a nearby soldier. It then attacked the rest.

"Well, it’s a chaos demon. What do they expect?" Spike pointed out.

"Meaning?"

"It’s chaotic. It does stuff like that."

As Buffy pondered this, the creature continued to move through the ranks of the Initiative.

Forrest was at the back, and continuing to shoot. Then he grabbed something from his belt and threw it. The demon batted it aside.

"Damn" the soldier muttered, as he backed away.

The device the Forrest had thrown was skittering away across the floor.

Buffy dived and grabbed it. She brought it over to Spike.

"What do you think this does?"

"It’s a disc. Attaches to things. Does something. Don’t know what."

"Let’s see."

Before he could do anything, Buffy grabbed Spike’s arm and pushed the disc onto it. He got a massive electric shock . Then, as he flailed his arms, he accidentally knocked the Slayer. He then get a large case of brain-burn from the chip in his head as well.

Buffy pulled the disc off Spike.

"Y’know," Spike groaned, as he tried to recover, "I think that was meant for

bigger animals. Like that demon."

"I guessed, Spike. Distract it."

Spike sighed, reloaded the gun and fired.

Meanwhile, Riley was checking the civilians outside.

"Everyone okay?"

"What was that?" asked one young student from the crowd.

"Oh, escaped gorilla or something." Riley quickly ad-libbed.

"But we don’t have a zoo anywhere near here!"

"Yeah, you’d be amazed how far they travel."

Back at the Initiative headquarters, Professor Walsh was checking through the information coming into her sensors. Then she found something in the crowd. A supernatural curiosity. A werewolf.

As Spike backed away from the demon, it was advancing towards him at some speed.

It seemed to be developing some kind of resistance to bullets. Spike hurled the gun at it, which had little effect. He grabbed the claws that had grown out of its hand. Spike could snap human bones with ease when he wasn’t "chipped". He was pleased to find demon’s bones were also snappable with effort. It roared.

Then Buffy came up behind it and attached the disc. As the electricity caused the demon to roar even more, the Initiative responded to an unintelligible order form Forrest. A hail of tranquilliser darts thudded into the creature, and it finally fell.

The soldiers were gathering the creatures. Buffy came over to one of them.

"Shouldn’t you kill it? Or do you people in fact represent the new committee to find non-lethal ways to stop demons?"

"We represent the Initiative. I’m sure we’ll see you again, miss."

Then she saw Forrest coming over and leapt away. She didn’t want them to see him. Spike had also left, before the Initiative realised he was their missing creature.

Buffy sighed. Not much left to do here. She went to see if Oz was still outside.

Giles lay on the sofa with a pillow over his head. For the third time in the last minute, he found himself regretting taking Xander in. The noise was driving him insane. He wondered if the bed could take it.

Buffy strolled in.

"Your door was unlocked. What’s that noise?"

"Xander and Anya."

"I’m thinking that hole might not be the only reason he was evicted."

Spike entered.

"Morning everyone. Get off my bed, librarian. If you’re going to make me sleep there, you can’t."

He paused. "What the hell is that?"

"Your new roommate and his girlfriend."

"Really."

Spike strode into Xander’s room.

"SHUT THE HELL UP YOU TWO!"

The responses came quickly.

"Get out!"

"HEY!"

Buffy turned to Giles. "Y’know, I may have said some rotten things about him in the past, but maybe he does have his charms."

Spike came out. "Right, my job here is done. Now I’ll go to sleep and dream of your violent deaths."

"Great. Have a nice night."

Spike lay down on the couch.

"Think I’d better get going. See you later Giles."

Willow was lying on her bed not sleeping. Oz’s photo was lying next to her. She had tears in her eyes. Oz could see them. The door was ajar. He was trying to summon up the strength to go in there and see her. He was unaware that he was on a clock.

Riley was hiding around the corner.

"Right, so what do you want us to capture?"

"A werewolf. It’s just around the corner."

Riley took a peek around the corner, then pulled back.

"That’s Oz. He’s Willow’s Ex. He’s probably here to see her."

Walsh was surprised. "You know him?"

"Not well."

Maggie raised an eyebrow. She tapped a few keys on her hey pad. As she did this, Riley’s eyes glazed over. His gaze was fixed straight ahead. Then he snapped out of it.

"Right. Do you know him, Riley?"

"Never seen him before, Professor."

"Really."

"Certain."

"Fine. Take him."

Oz reached for the door. He was finally prepared to see Willow again, and begin to make amends for what he’d done to her. He didn’t want anything else. Not that he would ever admit it.

But as he prepared to enter, the three soldiers charged. Oz barely had time to turn and raise an eyebrow in casual interest before a tranquilliser dart hit his shoulder.

Willow heard the noise from outside and got up. She realised the door was still open. She opened it and looked up and down the corridor. As she closed it, she smiled sadly.

"Hmph. And I thought it might be Oz."

NEXT, IN AN ALL NEW BUFFY: Oz is taken prisoner by the Initiative, and meets his new cellmate. A large and very pissed off chaos demon. Willow continues to pine after Oz, not knowing the danger he’s in. Meanwhile, some of our friends from LA come back to visit. And things go downhill from there in "Prisoners", out in June.

Did you like this episode? E-Mail Nick and let him know!

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