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The contents of this page are selections from anonymous people who are in a recovery program. Stop and read, you may find the answer here. Remember that progress, not perfection should be sought.
EASY DOES IT! , KEEP COMING BACK
There are only listed here. I got this file that way and have
NO idea what happened to the other three.
1 ) Stay away from that first drink, taking the 1st step daily.
2 ) Attend AA regularly and get involved.
3 ) Progress is made ONE DAY AT A TIME.
4 ) Use the 24 Hour plan.
5 ) Remember, your disease is incurable, progressive and fatal.
6 ) Do first things first.
7 ) Don't become too tired.
8 ) Eat at regular hours.
9 ) Use the telephone. (not just after the fact but during too.)
10) Be active - don't just sit around. Idle time will kill you.
11) Use the Serenity Prayer.
12) Change old routines and patterns.
13) Don't become too hungry.
14) Avoid loneliness.
15) Practice control of your anger.
16) Air your resentments.
17) Be willing to help whenever needed.
18) Be good to yourself, you deserve it.
19) Easy does it . . . . but do it.
20) Get out of the "IF ONLY" trap.
21) Remember HOW IT WAS. Your last drunk, the feelings etc.
22) Beaware of your emotions.
23) Help another in his/her recovery, extend your hand, listen.
24) Try to turn your life and your will over to your High Power.
25) Avoid all mood-altering drugs, read labels on all medicines.
26) Turn loose of old ideas.
27) Avoid drinking situations/occasions.
28) Replace old drinking buddies with new AA buddies.
29) Read the Big Book.
30) Try not to be dependent on another (sick relationships).
31) Be grateful and when not make a GRATITUDE list.
32) Get off the "Pity Pot"...the only thing you'll get is a ring
around your bottom if you don't.
33) See knowledgeable help when troubled and or otherwise.
34) Face it! You are powerless over alcohol, people, places and things.
35) Try the 12 and 12, not just 1 and 12 or 1, 12 and 13!
36) Let go and Let God.
37) Use the God bag and the answers: yes, no or wait I have something
better in store for you. Don't forget to say thanks.
38) Find courage to change through the example of others who have.
39) Don't try to test your will power - give an alcoholic one shovel
and one pail and in one hour he/she will need 100 wheel barrels.
40) Live TODAY, not YESTERDAY, not TOMORROW - projection is planning
the results before anything even happens.
41) Avoid emotional involvements the first year - you end up putting
the other person first and lose sight of "your" program.
42) Remember alcohol is - cunning, baffiling and powerful.
43) Rejoice in the manageability of your new life.
44) Be humble--Humility is not in thinking of your self more, but
in thinking more of yourself less often. Watch your ego.
45) Share your experience, strength and hope.
46) Cherish your recovery.
47) Dump your garbage regularly - GIGO = Garbage In Garbage Out.
48) Get plenty of "restful" sleep.
49) Stay sober for you - not someone else - otherwise it won't work.
50) Practice rigorous honesty with yourself and others.
51) Progress is made ONE DAY AT A TIME, not 10 years in one day!
55) Make no major decisions the first year.
56) Get a sponsor and use him/her. (not just selectively share).
57) Know that no matter what your problems, someone's had them before.
Don't be afraid to share, as a problem shared is one 1/2 solved.
58) Strive for progress not perfection.
59) When in doubt ask questions. The only stupid question is the one not asked.
You weren't afraid to speak before, so why start now.
60) Use prayer and meditation...not just pillow talk, get on those knees.
Put your shoes under the bed just in case someone's looking.
61) Maintain a balance: spiritual, physical, emotional and mental.
62) Don't use other substances as a maintenance program.
63) Learn to take spot check inventories.
64) Watch out for the RED FLAGS ... things that give excuses for poor
behavior and inevitable relapse.
65) Know that its okay to be human ... just don't drink over it.
66) Be kind to yourself; it's about time, don't you think.
67) Don't take yourself so seriously- take the disease seriously!
68) Know that whatever it is that's causing pain - it shall pass.
69) Stay as away from the DRY DRUNK SYNDROME as humanly as possible.
70) Don't give away more than you can afford too, your sobriety comes
first and must be the number 1 priority. Protect it at all costs.
71) Take down those bricks from the wall around you; you'll be able to see
the daylight better. Let people know who you are.
72) Get a home group and attend it regularly.
73) Know that the light at the end of the tunnel is not an oncoming train,
but actually a ray of hope. Drop the negativity.
74) Know that you are not alone, that's why the "We" is in the steps.
75) Be willing to go to any lengths to stay and be sober.
76) Know that no matter how bleak and dark your past may be, your future
is clean, bright and clear if you don't drink today.
77) Stay out of your own way.
78) Don't be in a hurry--remember "TIME = Things I Must Earn".
79) Watch the EGO. "EGO = Ease God Out".
80) Protect your sobriety at all costs. Keep the light on you.
81) Learn to listen, not just hear. Be open-minded and nonjudgmental.
82) Know that if your insides match your outsides, everyone looks good.
83) If the rest of the world looks bad, check yourself out first.
84) Gratitude is in the attitude.
85) When all else fails ... punt! Up the number of meetings!!!
86) Remember FEAR = FALSE EVIDENCE APPEARING REAL!
87) Remember FINE = Fouled up, Insecure/insane,
Neurotic and Emotionally imbalanced...watch the FINE.
88) Handle what you can and leave the rest, don't overtax yourself.
You can only accomplish so much in a given 24 hours.
89) Honesty and consistency are key factors in recovery.
90) Let the little kid in you out - learn how to laugh from the gut.
*** Note this list is not necessarily in order.
They are but suggestions and items to put in your little TOOL BAG.
True blue friends are rare and a blessing to have. They are our mentors, and conscience spoken from within, for without them, life would truly be blue. Stephen Kirkey. 01/17/97 (S.A.K.)
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development: 1) We will be amazed before we are halfway through. 2) We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. 3) We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. 4) We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. 5) No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. 6) That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. 7) We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. 8) Self-seeking will slip away. 9) Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. 10) Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. 11) We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. 12) We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
When . . . . everything goes against you . . . . Never give up. For that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.
Everything should be as simple as possible, but not simpler.
There are two days in every week about which we should not worry. Two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension. One of these days is yesterday with its mistakes and cares, Its faults and blunders, Its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control. All the money in the world cannot bring back yesterday. We cannot undo a single act we performed. We cannot erase a single word we said. Yesterday is gone. The other day we should not worry about is tomorrow. With Its possible adversities, Its burdens, Its large promise and poor performance. Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control. Tomorrow's Sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds, but it will rise. Until it does, we have no stake in tomorrow, for it is yet unborn. This just leaves only one day, today. Any person can fight the battles of just one day. It is only when you and I add the burdens of those two awful eternity's - yesterday and tomorrow that we break down. It is not the experience of today that drives people mad. It is the remorse or bitterness for something which happened yesterday and the dread of what tomorrow may bring. Let us therefore live but one day at a time.
1. We admitted we were powerless over
alcohol - that our lives had become
unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater
than ourselves could restore us to
sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and
our lives over to the care of God
as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral
inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and
to another human being the exact
nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God
remove all these defects of
character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our
shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had
harmed, and became willing to make
amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people
wherever possible, except when to
do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory
and when wrong promptly admitted
it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation
to improve our conscious contact
with God as we understood Him,
praying only for knowledge of His
will for us and the power to carry
that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as
the result of these steps, we tried
to carry this message to
alcoholics ,and to practise these
principles in all our affairs.
Many of us exclaimed, "What an order! I can't go through with it."
Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain
anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints.
The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines.
The principles we have set down are guides to progress.
We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.
Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and
our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:
a) That we were alcoholic and could not
manage our own lives.
b) That probably no human power could
have relieved our alcoholism.
c) That God could and would if He were
sought.
GOD SAYING THIS WORD I AM ADMITTING THE EXISTENCE OF A
CONSCIOUSNESS OR? OF? A HIGHER POWER THAT IS
GREATER THAN I.
GRANT SAYING THIS SECOND WORD, I AM ADMITTING THAT THIS
CONSCIOUSNESS OR HIGHER POWER IS ABLE TO BESTOW AND
GIVE TO ME AND TO OTHERS.
ME THE I AM ASKING SOMETHING FOR MYSELF. HOLY BOOKS SAY THAT
IF I ASK SINCERELY, IT SHALL BE GIVEN. IT IS NOT WRONG TO ASK
FOR IMPROVING MYSELF. FOR WITH THE IMPROVEMENT OF MY
CHARACTER, BOTH I AND PEOPLE AROUND ME WILL BE HAPPIER,
AND MY RELATIONSHIPS WILL HAVE A BETTER CHANCE TO IMPROVE.
SERENITY I AM ASKING FOR CALMNESS, COMPOSURE AND INNER PEACE IN MY
LIFE WHICH WILL ENABLE ME TO TRANSCEND MY EGO, TO THINK
STRAIGHT AND TO GOVERN MYSELF PROPERLY.
TO ACCEPT I AM RESIGNING MYSELF TO CONDITIONS AS THEY ARE RIGHT NOW.
I AM LIVING IN THE NOW, THE PRESENT MOMENT.
THE THINGS I ACKNOWLEDGE MY TRAGEDY, DEATH, SUFFERING, ILLNESS AND PAIN,
AS A PART OF MY LIFE, NEITHER GOOD NOR BAD. I ACCEPT MY
HUMANNESS AND FALLIBILITY. I AM ACCEPTING MY LOT IN LIFE AS IT IS.
UNTIL I HAVE THE COURAGE TO CHANGE ANY PART OF MY LIFE I DON'T
LIKE, I MUST ACCEPT IT, WITHOUT DOING SO GRUDGINGLY.
I CANNOT I CAN'T PREVENT THESE EVENTS OR CONDITIONS FROM HAPPENING TO
CHANGE... ME OR TO OTHERS.
COURAGE A QUALITY WHICH ENABLES ME TO DEAL WITH THE PROBLEMS AND
REALITIES OF LIFE WITHOUT RELIANCE ON ALCOHOL OR DRUGS. A
DETERMINATION TO STAND MY GROUND AND "SLUG IT OUT" WITH
ALL ISSUES, PLEASANT OR OTHERWISE, THAT MIGHT RETURN ME TO
DRINKING OR USING. A STRENGTH OF MY SPIRIT TO FACE AND HANDLE
THE NEGATIVE. FEARLESSNESS IN THE PRACTICE OF FAITH, HUMILITY
AND HONESTY.
TO CHANGE IN FACING THESE NEGATIVES DIRECTLY AND HONESTLY, I AM ASKING
FOR MYSELF AND MY LIFE CONDITIONS TO BE DIFFERENT FOR ME.
I AM TAKING AN ACTIVE PART IN THIS CHANGING.
THE THINGS I AM ASKING FOR HELP TO MAKE THE RIGHT DECISIONS.
I CAN EVERYTHING IS NOT THE WAY I WOULD LIKE IT TO BE IN MY LIFE.
I MUST CONTINUE TO FACE REALITY AND CONSTANTLY WORK TOWARD
MY CONTINUED GROWTH AND PROGRESS.
AND WISDOM I AM ASKING FOR THE ABILITY TO RISE ABOVE MY EGO AND FORM SOUND
JUDGMENTS ABOUT MYSELF AND MY LIFE. I THEN USE MY ABILITY TO ASK
FOR GUIDANCE FROM MYSELF, OTHERS AND A HIGHER POWER.
TO KNOW THE I WANT TO BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND CLEARLY TRUTHS OF FACT. I WANT
DIFFERENCE... TO SEE THINGS DIFFERENTLY IN MY LIFE SO THAT I WILL BE MORE AWARE
OF MYSELF AND OF OTHERS. I NEED TO SENSE A DEFINITE VALUE IN LOVING
OVER BEING SELFISH.
From: "Alcoholism & Spirituality"
by Charles Whitfield
The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than the past, than education, than money, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company ... a church ... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past ... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. Anonymous
May the journey of recovery offer you opportunities so you can know yourself and find alternatives to the choices you make. I I walk down the street; There is a deep hole in the sidewalk; I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless, It isn't my fault. It takes me forever to find a way out. II I walk down the same street; There is a deep hole in the sidewalk; I pretend I don't see it; I fall in again. I can't believe I am in the same place, but it isn't my fault. It still takes a long time to get out. III I walk down the same street; There is a deep hole in the sidewalk; I see it is there; I still fall in ... it's a habit. My eyes are open, I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately. IV I walk down the same street, There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it. V I walk down another street.
| LIABILITIES | _______________ | ASSETS |
| WATCH FOR: | STRIVE FOR: | |
| SELF-PITY | SELF-FORGETFULNESS | |
| SELF-JUSTIFICATION | HUMILITY | |
| SELF-IMPORTANCE | MODESTY | |
| SELF-CONDEMNATION | SELF-ESTEEM | |
| DISHONESTY | HONESTY | |
| IMPATIENCE | PATIENCE | |
| HATE | LOVE | |
| RESENTMENT | FORGIVENESS | |
| FALSE PRIDE | SIMPLICITY | |
| ENVY | GENEROSITY | |
| LAZINESS | ACTIVITY | |
| PROCRASTINATION | PROMPTNESS | |
| INSINCERITY | STRAIGHT FORWARDNESS | |
| NEGATIVE THINKING | POSITIVE THINKING | |
| VULGAR, IMMORAL THINKING | SPIRITUAL, CLEAN THINKING | |
| CRITICIZING | LOOK FOR THE GOOD ! | |
| UNBELIEF | FAITH | |
| GIVING UP | DETERMINATION | |
| HALF MEASURES | FULL MEASURE | |
| COMPLIANCE | COMMITMENT | |
To "let go" does not mean to stop caring; it means I can't do it for someone else. To "let go" is not to cut myself off; it is the realisation that I can't control another. To "let go" is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences. To "let go" is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands. To "let go" is not to try to change or blame another; it is to make the most of myself. To "let go" is not to care for, but to care about. To "let go" is not to "fix", but to be supportive. To "let go" is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being. To "let go" is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies. To "let go" is not to be protective; it is to permit another to face reality. To "let go" is not to deny, but to accept. To "let go" is not to nag, scold, or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and to correct them. To "let go" is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes, and to cherish myself in it. To "let go" is not to criticise and regulate anybody, but to try to become what I dream I can be. To "let go" is not to regret the past, but to grow and to live for the future. To "let go" is to fear less and to love more.
Go placidly amid the noise and haste and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe; no less than the trees and the stars, you have a right to be here. And whether or not it's clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive God to be; and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it's still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
1. I will not help you stay and wallow in Limbo. 2. I will help you to grow, to become more productive, by your definition. 3. I will help you become more autonomous, more loving of yourself, more excited, less sensitive, more free to continue becoming the authority for your own living. 4. I cannot give you dreams or "fix you up", simply because I cannot. 5. I cannot give you growth, or grow for you. You must grow yourself, by facing reality, grim as it may be at times. 6. I cannot take away your loneliness or pain. 7. I cannot sense your world for you, evaluate your goals for you, or tell you what is best for you in your world, for you have your own world. 8. I cannot convince you of the crucial choice of choosing the scary uncertainty of growing, over the safe misery of not growing. 9. I want to be with you and know you as a rich and growing friend; yet I cannot get close to you when YOU choose not to GROW. 10. When I begin to care for you out of pity, when I begin to lose trust in you, then I am toxic and bad, inhibiting for you, and you for me. 11. You MUST know - my helping is conditional; I will be with you, I will hang in there with you, as long as I continue to get even the slightest hints that you are willing and still trying to GROW. 12. If you can accept all of this, then perhaps we can help each other to become what God meant us to be - mature adults - leaving childishness forever to the little children. Anonymous
If I feel that I am defeated and have lost confidence in my ability to win, I need to sit down, take a piece of paper and make a list, not of the factors that are against me, but of those that are for me. If anybody thinks constantly of the forces that seem to be against him or her, that person will build them up into a power far beyond that which is justified. They will assume a formidable strength which they do not actually possess. But if, on the contrary, I mentally visualize and affirm and reaffirm my assets and keep my thoughts on them, emphasizing them to the fullest extent, I will rise out of any difficulty regardless of what it may be. My inner powers will reassert themselves and, with the help of God, lift me from defeat to victory.
1) Formulate and stamp indelibly on your mind a mental picture of yourself
as succeeding. Hold this picture tenaciously. Never permit it to fade.
Your mind will seek to develop this picture. Never think of yourself as
failing; never doubt the reality of the mental image. That is most
dangerous, for the mind always tries to complete what it pictures.
So always picture "success" no matter how badly things seem to be
going at the moment.
2) Whenever a negative thought concerning your personal powers come
to mind, deliberately voice a positive thought to cancel it out.
3) Do not build up obstacles in your imagination. Depreciate every so-called
obstacle. Minimize them. Difficulties must be studied and efficiently dealt
with to be eliminated, but they must be seen for only what they are. They
must not be inflated by fear thoughts.
4) Do not be awestruck by other people and try to copy them. Nobody can
be you as efficiently as YOU can. Remember also that most people, despite
their confident appearance and demeanour, are often as scared as you are
and as doubtful of themselves.
5) Ten times a day repeat these dynamic words, "If God be for us who can be
against us?" (Romans 8:31) Whenever you think of these words stop
AT ONCE and repeat them slowly and confidently! It most definitely will
"improve your conscious contact with God".
6) Get a competent counsellor to help you understand why you do what you
do. Learn the origin of your inferiority and self-doubt feelings which often
begin in childhood. Self-knowledge leads to a cure.
7) Ten times each day practise the following affirmation, repeating it out loud
if possible. "I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me."
(Philippians 4:13) Repeat those words AT ONCE whenever you think of them
(in addition to the 10 chosen times mentioned above). That magic statement
is the most powerful antidote on earth to inferiority thoughts.
8) Make a true estimate of your own abiltiy, then raise it 10 percent. Do not
become egotistical. but develop a wholesome self-respect. Believe in your
own God-released powers.
9) Put yourself in God's hands. To do that simply state, "I am in God's hands."
Then believe you are NOW receiving all the power you need. "Feel" it flowing
into you. Affirm that "the kingdom of God is within you" (Luke 17:21) in
the form of adequate power to meet life's demands.
10) Remind yourself that God is with you and nothing can defeat you. Believe that
you now RECEIVE power from Him.
The whole secret of happiness is to be interested in a lot of things… Remember well and bear in mind. A good - true friend is hard to find. And when you find one who is good and true. Don't trade him off for one who is new. Remember well and bear in mind. That a life of sobriety is hard to find. Now that you have it - stop and think. Before you reach for that first drink. The joys of sobriety are many and great. But take one drink and many hearts you'll break. The heartaches, hangovers, remorse and pain. I'm sure we don't want to experience again. So in all sincerity I say to you friend. MAY YOUR LIFE OF SOBRIETY NEVER END. -- Anonymous
The Lord is my sponsor, I shall not want.
He maketh me go to many meetings.
He leadeth me to sit back, relax and listen with an open mind.
He restoreth my soul, my sanity and health.
He leadeth me in paths of serenity and fellowship for my sake.
He teacheth me to think, take it easy, to live and let live, and
do first things first.
He maketh me honest, humble and grateful.
He teacheth me to accept the things I cannot change,
to change the things I can, and giveth me the wisdom
to know the difference.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of despair, frustration,
guilt and remorse, I will fear no evil.
For thou art with me.
The program, the way of life, the twelve steps, they comfort me.
Thou prepatest a table before me in the presence of mine
enemies - which are rationalization, fear, anxiety, selfpity,
and resentment.
Thou anointest my confused mind and jangled nerves with
knowledge, understanding, and hope.
No longer am I alone, neither am I afraid or sick or hopeless.
Surely serenity shall follow me every day of my life, 24 hours
at a time; as I surrender my will to thee, and carry the
message to others.
I will dwell in the house of the Higher Power, as I understand
Him, daily, forever and ever.
-- Anonymous
1. It is a victory, not a failure, to admit that I cannot control my
problems, for then I can turn to a higher power and begin to find
serenity.
2. It is constructive to take an honest look at myself, face the true
feelings and communicate honestly.
3. It is an act of courage, not shame, to admit any wrong i've done
and ask forgiveness of God, myself and others.
4. It is healthy to accept and love myself, and to let others love me,
because like everyone else, I'am worthy and deserving of love and a
good life.
5. It is O.K. to trust myself and others, I can be responsible for
myself, as others can be for themselves.
6. It is possible for me to be happy, since happiness depends on myself
and my attitude, not on things or other people.
7. It is possible for me to recover, If I believe I can and I'm willing
to take the necessary action for change.
8. It is better to set realistic goals for change; I can accomplish them
one step at a time and one day at a time. I can't do it all, or do it
perfectly, but I can do something. If I fail, It's okay - there's no
failure except in not trying.
9. It is all right to set limits to keep myself sane and serene. It's
okay to let things go that cannot be changed or do not matter.
10. It is good to take the time to stay in touch with myself and God
through prayer and meditation.
Alcohol is a product of amazing versatility, It will remove the stains from designer clothes, It will also remove the clothes off your back, If by chance it is used in sufficient quantity, Alcohol will remove furniture from the home, Rugs from the floor, food from the table, Lining from the stomach, vision from the eyes, And judgment from the mind. Alcohol will also remove good reputations, Good jobs, good friends, happiness from children's hearts, Sanity, freedom, spouses, relationships, And mans ability to adjust and live with his fellow man, And even life itself. As a remover, alcohol has no equal!
In the alcoholic, "frustration begot resentment, resentment begot self-pity, self-pity begot drinking, and drinking begot frustration, and frustration begot resentment, and resentment begot self-pity," and on and on and on - . In an unending cycle, until faced with the three-pronged choice: Sobriety or insanity or death. And then we chose sobriety in A.A. and we learned the principle that: If the alcoholic repeated any part of the cycle, the entire cycle would repeat itself, "in toto." father John Doe: 'Sobriety Without End' --------------------------------------------------------------- "God grant us the grace to see ourselves as you see us; So that knowing ourselves and your will, we will be enabled to carry it out."
Utter confusion, misery and pain,
Humiliation, remorseful, ashamed.
Dreading to face the light of each day,
Not wanting to hear what people would say.
Like, "Where is your power? Where is your pride?"
They don't understand that deep down inside
I wish I knew the answers to give,
Or how to find the courage to live.
I had taken pills they told me I should.
I tried all the cures, but they did no good.
I made many promises and meant them too.
But the compulsion to drink is stronger than you.
One day a friend happened to say:
"I know the answer, I can show you a way.
All it takes is an open mind.
Believe what you hear from your own kind."
I went to a meeting, they read Chapter V.
The steps made some sense and hope was revived.
I saw living proof of what faith can do.
It worked for them, why not for you ?
One day at a time, they told me to live.
They said, 'Easy does it.' And 'Learn to forgive.'
Be humble, be honest and help when you can.
Pass on what you learn to a new man.
I heard them repeat the Serenity Prayer.
And soon realized all my answers were there.
Now, when someone asks, "Can miracles be?"
May I always reply, "Take a look at me."
-- Anonymous
You must believe in yourself at all times. You must never lose
faith that you are capable of doing anything in life you choose
to do, and you must always choose the highest. It is not enough
for you to choose that you must achieve excellence. For you must
believe in yourself enough to accomplish that which others cannot
accomplish.
To believe in yourself, you must have courage that exceeds the need
for the consideration of courage. It must be a natural part of
your life that avoids any need for decision making based on whether
you have courage to do that which you must. This must be a belief
beyond personal questioning, beyond personal doubt, to a point when
it can no longer be considered courage but rather a way of life.
This shall be so, for you will believe in yourself.
You must have character that is beyond criticism and is a permanent
part of yourself. It is not imagined or pretended. Every moment of
your life must be naturally conducted with pride and dignity that
cannot be confused with arrogance but recognized with respect.
Your character must always contain compassion and concern for others.
This concern will be genuine, for you will never lose sight of your
background in trying to understand those you have difficulty in
identifying with, for they are the majority of the world and the
character never bends, never compromises and is consistent.
You must believe in intellect that no task is beyond your
ability to succeed. Your intellect is a gift that you shall not
waste and you shall use to its greatest capacity. You must have
the patience and tolerance to realize that others will not always
agree with or understand you. But rather than find fault, you
shall try harder to reach them, for it shall become your responsibility
to serve them. This is your calling. You cannot question it.
you must accept it.
-- Anonymous
So you've been around for many years, helping to spread A.A. You've worked like Hell since you first came in but what did you do today? I heard your pitch it was kind of long, you really told them how you worked the steps in "71, but how are you working them now? Do you still get up from your soft warm bed when someone is in trouble? Do you grab your hat and your A.A. book and get there on the double? Or have you forgotten the early times when you were sort of new. Maybe you've been around to long that A.A. 's old hat to you. Maybe you're one of the senior saints, sober and satisfied, and you've forgotten when you were sick and when you darn near died. Maybe I shouldn't bring it up, maybe your too blase, but just for the Hell of it mister, what did you do today? Have you been around so cock-eyed long that you have to leave it up to Harry or Sam, cause your not your brothers keeper and you don't give a damn? Maybe tonight the Sports are on, or you could be in a lot of pain. So what the Hell if the guy or gal is sick, they have only themselves to blame. Well mister, you have a perfect right to work your own A.A. and you know you'll do it only your own way no matter what I say. But tonight before you go to bed, just look in the glass and pray, that you and the Lord know the answer to, what did I do today? -- Anonymous
When ever bad feelings prevail.
Don’t let them shadow and take control of your life
or you will end up living that feeling which will cause
you to fail, lead you to resentments, self-pity, remorse,
self-centeredness, giving up and ultimately emotional imbalance.
Use the facts as they are and look for the good in those
facts. Use the good to remove the bad feelings that blind
and prevent you from seeing the truth instead of the feeling.
S.A.K. 1997
I drank to be witty - and I became a boor. I drank to relax - and I couldn't stop my hands from shaking. I drank to feel good - and I suffered through sickening hangovers. I drank to be happy - and it made me depressed. I drank to be a good dancer - and it made me a stranger. I drank to be a good conversationalist - and I couldn't pronounce the words. I drank to be sociable - and I became angry and resentful. I drank to help my appetite - and cheated my body of nutrition by not eating right. I drank to be a good lover - and I couldn't perform. I drank to show I was a man - and became a slobbering, bawling baby. I drank to be popular - and lost my friends. I drank to enjoy life - and contemplated suicide. I drank for camaraderie - and drove everyone away from me. I drank to escape - and built a prison for myself. I drank to find peace - and I found hell. -- Anonymous
Sometime, when you're feeling important, Sometime, when your ego's in bloom, Sometime, when you take it for granted You're the best qualified in the room. Sometime, when you feel that your going Would leave an unfillable hole, Just follow this simple instruction And see how it humbles your soul. Take a bucket and fill it with water, Put your hand in it, up to your wrist, Pull it out; and the hole that's remaining Is a measure of how you'll be missed. You may splash all you please when you enter, You can stir up the water galore, But stop, and you'll find in a minute That it looks quite the same as before. The moral in this quaint example Is do just the best you can, Be proud of yourself, but remember, There's is no indispensable person.
Honesty ! Open Mindedness ! Willingness ! Live and let live ! First things first ! Keep coming back ! Easy does it ... but do it ! Keep it simple … make it fun ! But for the grace of God ! One day at a time ! Let it be ! A closed mind is a wonderful thing to loose ! You are not alone ! Remember When ! Talk and grow ! Listen and learn ! Some one cares ! Let go and let God ! Fake it till you make it ! How important is it ? Trust ! Use it or lose it ! Acceptance !
In moments of stress, try to think about beautiful things which are calm and peaceful. I must keep calm and unmoved In the vicissitudes of life. I must go backinto the silence of communion with God to recover this calm when it is lost even for one moment. I will accomplish more by this calmness than by all the activities of a long day. AT ALL COST I WILL KEEP CALM. I can solve nothing when I am agitated. I should keep away from those things that are upsetting emotionally. I should run on an even keel and not get tipped over by emotional upsets. I should seek for things that are calm and good and true and stick to these things. "I pray that I may not argue or contend but merely state calmly what I believe to be true. I pray that I may keep in that state of calmness that comes in faith in God's purpose for the world." If you cannot find the time to stop and smell the fragrance of a flower. If you are in such a rush that you cannot pause and listen to the song of a bird. If your life is so full that you cannot rest awhile and hear the ripple of a stream. If life is such a burden that you cannot hear the beauty in a newborn baby's cry. Then, dear friend, you have not found time to live. For it is in such things as these you will find the true meaning of life in all its glory and splendor.
Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not try to tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appal me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime. Just for today I will be happy. Most folk are as happy as they make up their minds to be. Just for today I will adjust myself to what is and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it. Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration. Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways. I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out; if anyone knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don't want to do- just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I won't show it. Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, talk low, act courteously, criticize not one bit, not find fault with anything, and not try to improve or regulate anybody except myself. Just for today I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision. Just for today I will have a quiet half-hour all by myself, and relax. During this half-hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective on my life. Just for today I will be unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.
I asked God to take away my pride, And God said, "No." He said it was not for Him to take away, But for me to give up. I asked God to make my handicapped child whole, And God said, "No." He said her spirit is whole Her body is only temporary. I asked God to grant me patience, And God said, "No." He said, "Patience is a by-product of tribulation. It isn't granted, it's earned." I asked God to give me happiness, And God said "No." He said, "He gives blessings Happiness is up to me." I asked God to spare me pain, And God said, "No. Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to Me." I asked God to make my spirit grow And God said, "No." He said "I must grow on my own, But He will prune me to make me fruitful." I asked God to help me love others As much as He loves me, And God said, "Ah, finally, you have the idea."
Take time to THINK ........ it is the source of power. Take time to PLAY ..... It is the secret of perpetual youth. Take time to READ ...... It is the fountain of wisdom. Take time to PRAY ..... It is the greatest power on earth. Take time to LOVE and BE LOVED ...... It is a God-given privilege. Take time to be FRIENDLY ..... It is the road to happiness. Take time to LAUGH ..... It is the music of the soul. Take time to GIVE ..... It is too short a day to be selfish. Take time to WORK .... It is the price of success. Take time to DO CHARITY ..... It is the key to heaven
ABSOLUTE HONESTY: Both with ourselves and with others, in word, deed and thought. ABSOLUTE UNSELFISHNESS: To be willing wherever possible to help others who need our help. ABSOLUTE LOVE: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. And . . . Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." ABSOLUTE PURITY: Purity of mind, of body and of purpose.
Speak to people. There is nothing as nice as a cheerful greeting. Call people by name . not names, the sweetest music is to hear one's name called. Have humility. There is something to be learned from every living thing. Be friendly. If you want to have a friend, be one. Be cordial. Speak and act as if everything you to is a pleasure. Be interested in others. You can like almost everybody if you try. Be generous with praise, cautious with criticism. Give your word; then keep it. Be considerate of the feelings of others. Be alert to give service. What counts most in life is what we do for others.
NATIVE PRAYER O Great Spirit whose voice I hear in the winds, and whose breath gives life to all the world, hear me. I come before you, one of your many children. I am small and weak. I need your strength and wisdom. Let me walk in beauty and make my eyes ever behold the red and purple sunset. Make my hands respect the things you have made, my ears sharp to hear your voice. Make me wise, so that I may know the things you have taught my people, the lessons you have hidden in every leaf and rock. I seek strength not to be superior to my brother and sisters, but to be able to fight my greatest enemy....myself. Make me ever ready to come to you with clean hands and straight eyes, so when life fades as a fading sunset my spirit may come to you without shame.
LIFES TERM'S PRAYER Dear God. Please help me to accept the way things are, and to look for the good in any situation i face in life. Stephen. K. 1998 (S.A.K)
Remember your ABC's A - Avoid negative sources, people, places, things and habits. B - Believe in yourself. C - Consider things from every angle. D - Don't give up. E - Enjoy life today; yesterday is gone. F - Family and friends are hidden treasures. Seek them and enjoy their riches. G - Give more than you planned to give. H - Hang on to your dreams. I - Ignore those who try to discourage you. J - Just do it. K - Keep on trying. No matter how hard it seems, it will get easier. L - Love yourself first and most. M - Make it happen. N - Never lie, cheat or steal. Always strike a fair deal. O - Open your eyes, and see things as they really are. P - Practice makes perfect. Q - Quitters never win, and winners never quit. R - Read, study and learn about everything important in your life. S - Stop procrastinating. T - Take control of your own destiny. U - Understand yourself in order to better understand others. V - Visualize it. W - Want it more than anything. (X) - Accelerate your efforts. Y - You are unique, nothing can replace you. Z - Zero in on your target, and go for it ! -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Loyalty is better than logic. Hope is better than disparagement. Creation is better than destruction.
You will never be sorry... For thinking before acting. For hearing before judging. For forgiving your enemies. For helping a fallen brother. For being honest in business. For standing by your principles. For stopping your ears to gossip. For bridling a slanderous tongue. For harboring only pure thoughts. For sympathizing witn the afflicted. For being courteous to all.
Personality Traits Of C0-Dependents CARETAKER Learned that being responsible for others was rewarded. Took care of younger brothers and sisters, and went out of my way to fix and clean up things around the house. Developed need: For someone to take care of: a baby PEOPLE PLEASER Learned to never make waves; rather, to make everyone happy. Everyone counted but me, and I never said no. Developed need: For someone who wants to be pleased, and will take advantage of me. MARTYR Learned to endure in the face of pain, no matter how much was asked of me, no matter how much it hurt. My strokes came from being able to endure pain and carry on. I developed a capacity to do without. Developed need: To create pain, if there isn't any there. STUFFER Learned that no one cared how I felt, so stuffed the thoughts and feelings. Learned to not acknowledge, let alone share them. Developed need: For someone who doesn't count my thoughts and feelings. WORK-A-HOLIC Learned to not waste time talking and enjoying, because it was more important to produce. Had a long list of things to be done, and always expected to do more. Developed need: For things to do. PERFECTIONIST Learned that achieving, getting all A's, etc., was the way to be OK. No matter how good I did something, it was never good enough. I had to do more, better. Developed need: To adopt ever higher standards and hurdles. FIGHTER Learned that by getting angry I might get the "good stuff'. Learned to express myself with violence and anger. Developed need: For someone and something to be angry about. CHANGING HABITS CARETAKER Let go and Let God PEOPLE PLEASER I respect my integrity. MARTYR I see beauty today, and enjoy it. STUFFER I feel and share thoughts and feelings. WORK-A-HOLIC I have quiet time to relax and am valuable apart from producing. PERFECTIONIST I make mistakes and it's OK. FIGHTER I am learning to play and enjoy others.
You're Special In all the world there's nobody like you. Since the beginning of time there has never been another person like you. Nobody has your smile, nobody has your eyes, your nose, your hair, your hands, your voice. You're special No one can be found who has your handwriting. Nobody anywhere has your tastes for food, clothing, music or art. No one sees things just as you do. In all of time there's been no one who laughs like you, no one who cries like you, and what makes you cry or laugh will never produce identical laughter and tears from anybody else, ever. You're the only one in all of creation who has your set of abilities. Oh, there will always be somebody who is better at one of the things you're good at, but no one in the universe can reach the quality of your combination of talents, ideas, abilities and feelings. Like a room full of musical instruments, some may excel alone, but none can match the symphony sound when all are played together. You're a symphony. Through all of eternity, no one will ever look, talk, walk, think or do like you. You're special... you're rare. And in all rarity there is great value. Because of your great value you need not attempt to imitate others... you will accept, yes, celebrate your differences. You're special and you're beginning to realize it's no accident that you're special. You're beginning to see that God made you special for a purpose. He must have a job for you that no one else can do as well as you. Out of the billions of applicants, only one is qualified, only one has the right combination of what it takes. That one is you, because... you're special. Author Unknown.
SAYINGS Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen every day. Take charge of your attitude. Don't let someone else choose it for you. Be an actor not a reactor. Commit yourself to constant self-improvement. Be brave, Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference. Learn to listen. Opportunity sometimes knocks very softly. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know. Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life-and-death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems. Praise in public - Criticize in private. Don't major in minor things. Remember that a successful marriage depends on 2 things 1. finding the right person and 2. being the right person. Judge success by the degree that you're enjoying peace, health and love. Live your life as an exclamation, not an explanation. Instead of saying if only, try saying next time. Evaluate yourself by your own standards, not someone else's. Know when to be silent, when to speak. When you have a disagreement with someone, regardless of who is wrong, apologize. Say "I'm sorry I upset you. Please forgive me. These are healing, magical words. Improve your performance by improving your attitude. Watch for big problems. They disguise big opportunities Don't be called on strikes - Go down swinging. Be a leader. Remember the lead sled dog is the only one with a decent view. Forget committees. New, noble, world changing ideas always come from one person working alone.
A FAREWELL LETTER TO A CLOSE COMPANION
I wanted to take this time to say farewell to a close companion who stuck with me through thick and thin. That companion was you, alcohol and drugs, - from the whiskey to the beer, hash, and pot. This letter is not easy for me to write since you played a big part in my life for nearly twenty years. When I first met you it was the best thing I could ever imagine, but somehow along the way, the best turned to the worst. But, like I said, you hung in there with me. When the going got tough, we said it would be different next time around. So when I was assured of that promise I was destined for a new journey without any mistakes on my behalf. But that promise was never kept. When trouble arrived on a regular basis, I was left there holding the bag. So that leaves me with no other choice but to say farewell. To be honest with you, I will never forget you. It's not that I don't want to, but I must not forget the awful experiences I have endured. I'm not sure you're going to leave without a fight or one last compromise on your behalf, because you see, you're just a mist lingering in the air. I know you are probably saying, "You can't live without me as your companion, because after this you will have no one to turn to." Rest assured, I will have some one there for me, and he is God. Anyway, you wouldn't know anything about this God. He has given me a set of promises which I am determined to try. Would you believe, he has yet to let me down after I last socialized with you. All he asks of me is to stay far away from you my companion. And he will reveal to me a change I can live with, but only if I never see you again. Look on the bright side. You never have to fulfill your broken promises to me again. And we never have to do battle again. Because the battle is over, and the war has just begun. It will be against you, my close companion. from Roderick and his best friend, God
11 THINGS TO GO BY 11 THINGS TO GO BY 1 IT HURTS TO LOVE SOMEONE AND NOT BE LOVED IN RETURN, BUT WHAT IS MORE PAINFUL IS TO LOVE SOMEONE AND NEVER FIND THE COURAGE TO LET THAT PERSON KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. 2 A SAD THING IN LIFE IS WHEN YOU MEET SOMEONE WHO MEANS A LOT TO YOU, ONLY TO FIND OUT IN THE END THAT IT WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE AND YOU JUST HAVE TO LET GO. 3 THE BEST KIND OF FRIEND IS THE KIND YOU CAN SIT ON A PORCH SWING WITH, NEVER SAY A WORD, AND THEN WALK AWAY FEELING LIKE IT WAS THE BEST CONVERSATION YOU'VE EVER HAD. 4 IT'S TRUE THAT WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'VE GOT UNTIL WE LOSE IT, BUT IT'S ALSO TRUE THAT WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'VE BEEN MISSING UNTIL IT ARRIVES. 5 IT TAKES ONLY A MINUTE TO GET A CRUSH ON SOMEONE, AN HOUR TO LIKE SOMEONE, AND A DAY TO LOVE SOMEONE - - BUT IT TAKES A LIFETIME TO FORGET SOMEONE. 6 DON'T GO FOR LOOKS; THEY CAN DECEIVE. DON'T GO FOR WEALTH; EVEN THAT FADES AWAY. GO FOR SOMEONE WHO MAKES YOU SMILE BECAUSE IT TAKES ONLY A SMILE TO MAKE A DARK DAY SEEM BRIGHT. 7 DREAM WHAT YOU WANT TO DREAM; GO WHERE YOU WANT TO GO; BE WHAT YOU WANT TO BE, BECAUSE YOU HAVE ONLY ONE LIFE AND ONE CHANCE TO DO ALL THE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO. 8 ALWAYS PUT YOURSELF IN THE OTHER'S SHOES. IF YOU FEEL THAT IT HURTS YOU, IT PROBALBY HURTS THE PERSON TOO. 9 A CARELESS WORD MAY KINDLE STRIFE; A CRUEL WORD MAY WRECK A LIFE. 10 THE HAPPIEST OF PEOPLE DON'T NECESSARILY HAVE THE BEST OF EVERYRTHING, THEY JUST MAKE THE MOST OF EVERYTHING THAT COMES ALONG THEIR WAY. 11 LOVE BEGINS WITH A SMILE, GROWS WITH A KISS, ENDS WITH A TEAR. WHEN YOU WERE BORN, YOU WERE CRYING AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU WAS SMILING. LIVE YOUR LIFE SO THAT WHEN YOU DIE, YOU'RE THE ONE SMILING AND EVERYONE AROUND YOU IS CRYING. ALWAYS REMEMBER – LIFE IS PRECIOUS, DON'T LET IT SLIP BY.
THINGS THAT I'VE LEARNED. . . . . . . . . .(But, sadly, seldom remember) I've learned - that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life. I've learned - that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be. I've learned - that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them. I've learned - that you can keep going long after you can't. I've learned - that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. I've learned - that either you control your attitude or it controls you. I've learned - that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place. I've learned - that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences. I've learned - that money is a lousy way of keeping score. I've learned - that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time. I've learned - that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up. I've learned - that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. I've learned - that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. I've learned - that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. I've learned - that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated. I've learned - that your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't biological. I've learned - that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that. I've learned - that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself. I've learned - that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief. I've learned - that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become. I've learned - that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do. I've learned - that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change. I've learned - that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever. I've learned - that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different. I've learned - that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you. I've learned - that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help. I've learned - that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being. I've learned - that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.
BUTT PRINTS IN THE SAND One night I had a wondrous dream, One set of footprints there was seen, The footprints of my precious Lord, But mine were not along the shore. But then some stranger prints appeared, And I asked the Lord, "What have we here?" Those prints are large and round and neat, But Lord, they are too big for feet. "My child," He said in somber tones, "For miles I carried you alone. I challenged you to walk in faith, But you refused and made me wait. "You disobeyed, you would not grow, The walk of faith, you would not know So I got tired, I got fed up, and there I dropped you on your butt." "Because in life , there comes a time when one must fight, and one must climb, when one must rise and take a stand, or leave their butt prints in the sand.
SELF-RESPECT PRAYER O God, teach me that self-respect cannot be hunted. It cannot be purchased. It is never for sale. It comes to me when I am alone, in quiet moments, in quiet places, when I suddenly realize that, knowing the good, I have done it; knowing the beautiful, I have served it; knowing the truth, I have spoken it.
OPEN MIND Higher Power, may I understand: To be alert to my own needs, not to the faults of others; To remain teachable; To Listen; To keep an open mind; and To learn not who's right but what's right.
FIRST THINGS FIRST Dear Higher Power, remind me: To tidy up my own mind, To keep my sense of value straight, To sort out the possible and the impossible, To turn the impossible over to you, And get busy on the possible.
Twelve Rewards of the 12 Step Program 1) HOPE Instead of Desparation 2) FAITH Instead of Despair 3) COURAGE Instead of Fear 4) PEACE OF MIND Instead of Confusion 5) SELF RESPECT Instead of Self-Contempt 6) SELF-CONFIDENCE Instead of Helplessness 7) THE RESPECT OF OTHERS Instead of their Pity & Contempt 8) CLEAN CONSCIENCE Instead of a Sense of Guilt 9) REAL FRIENDSHIPS Instead of Loneliness 10) A CLEAN PATTERN OF LIFE Instead of a Purposeless Existence 11) THE LOVE & UNDERSTANDING OF OUR FAMILIES Instead of their Sadness, Fear and Disgust 12) THE FREEDOM OF A HAPPY LIFE Instead of the Bondage of an Alcoholic Obsession
What Is Love Love is fragile, yet it is strong. It can be given and received freely, it plays its own song. There are many ways to show it. Here are some: Forgiveness Acceptance Interest Tolerance Helpfulness Thoughtfulness Respect Unselfishness Sharing Trusting Honesty Openness Politeness Embracement Willingness Grace Listening Letting go Peace Caring Giving Living Understanding Love is under pressure in this world of mixed emotions. Love is what it is, there are many who have their perceptions. There are some who say, it is the co-dependency upon another. If so, then let it be so, I need my God, my Father. Let them write their books on it, based from their own sin. Let them blame and transcend one another with fraudulent phrases. Let them confuse the ones who are weak and seek the truth. For it cannot be bottled or placed in a book. Love is a gift from God for all of mankind. Love is not to be broken up and analyzed. Love is meant to be used, as much as you can stand. Love is God working though us, its the touch of the masters hand. Love is joy, as well as it is pain. It is a real feeling to be taken not in vain. Love is not to be denied and filled with self-blame. For from this pain, we seek humility and place it before Our Father, and from this, a forgiveness of self. For Love, it allows us to fortify a faith and trust in one another. Love means freedom, trust, belief and growth in self, and is to share it with someone else. Love is, to be, that, is the question, and the answer all in one. Love is the circle, its roundness, it glows, it is, well spun. Stephen. A. Kirkey. July 22, 2003 (S.A.K.)
Forgiveness It is such mighty and powerful word. It means to make an amends with no strings or demands. It can be applied on oneself or presented to another's open hand. It's a form of surrender, to cast not a mortal blow. It's the laying of arms to one who was once thought of as a foe. It's meant to lighten those burdens, which rest upon on our immortal soul. It is the beginning, not the end, for each one of us, that journey, that is to unfold. Stephen. A. Kirkey. July 21 2003 (S.A.K.)
The Willingness Of Letting Go Sometimes
the consideration causes more pain then gain.Sometimes
it turns out to be one big deal.Sometimes
that good intention was miss understood.Sometimes
a nudge turns out to be a harsh push that is not good.Sometimes
what was thought to be let go of, was still hung onto. It may have been by a thin strand of hair, but it was amplified and weighted and as big as a house.Sometimes
hope is hopeless.Sometimes
I expect to much on it and myself, and I become selfish inside. This form of pride fools me to justify my wants, it erodes my intentions with the fog of insecurities. So I say onto God, to take this cup away from me, I can't stand it anymore.I surrender
to let it go, to let it be, to live and let live, to set me and it free. S.A.K. July 25, 2003 a sponsors reply......DO IT ANYWAY *
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.
* (The claim is often that it was written by Mother Teresa, but I've heard that it was merely a meditation that she had great love and respect for. It was, according to some sources, the work of another person. I don't know his name. Anyway ... it is a great meditation and is very much in tune with a line in your "The willingness of Letting Go" which states, "Sometimes, that good intention was miss understood". The meditation say, "Do It Anyway"You say that when you say, "I surrender, to let it go, to let it be, to live and let live, to set me and it free.")
Why Am I Here ? I didn't ask to be born, but I am here I didn't ask to have parents but I have them I didn't ask to be me, but I am me I didn't ask to have problems, but I have them I didn't ask for life, but I have been given it I didn't ask, but the answers came forth I didn't have answers, but I found them I didn't know the meaning of life, but I found it through the people I met I didn't ask to have addictions, but I have them I didn't ask to have friends, but I have some I didn't accept me, but I learned to like me I didn't love me, but I learn to accept who I am and love me I didn't ask to be loved, but I know I am loved I didn't know God, but he knew me Oh God, I ask you to be my mentor, because I need someone to talk to, and only you, can understand me. S. A. K. July 10, 2003
Sponsor To Sponsee Suggestions 01. Pray. 02. Go to bed on time. 03. Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed. 04. Say NO, to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health. 05. Delegate tasks to capable others. 06. Simplify and unclutter your life. 07. Less is more. Although one is often not enough, two are often too many. 08. Allow extra time to do things and to get to places. 09. Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together. 10. Take one day at a time. 11. Separate worries from concerns. If a situation is a concern, find out what God would have you to do and let go of the anxiety. If you can't do anything about a situation, forget it. 12. Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases. 13. Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc., 14. K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble. 15. Do something for the Kid in You everyday. 16. Carry a Big Book with you to read while waiting in line. 17. Get enough exercise. 18. Eat right. 19. Get organized so everything has its place. 20. Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life. 21. Write thoughts and inspirations down. 22. Every day, find time to be alone. 23. Having problems? Talk to God on the spot. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don't wait until it's time to go to bed to pray. 24. Make friends with Godly people. 25. Keep a folder of favorite spiritual writings on hand. 26. Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a good "Thank you HP.!" 27. Laugh! 28. Laugh some more! 29. Take your work seriously, but yourself not at all. 30. Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can). 31. Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most). 32. Sit on your ego. 33. Talk less; listen more. 34. Slow down. 35. Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe. 36. Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that you've never been grateful for before.This Page, Established: August 1997 TOP OF PAGE