What's he on about now?

In case the articles, essays and opinions throughtout this site just weren't enough for you, here's my online diary (a.k.a. 'blog'). It's as close as you'll come to the inside of my head, so don't say I didn't warn you
(and remember, you can always e-mail me if you love or loathe anything you're about to read)...


   Thursday, March 04, 2004

LOOK WHAT I HAVE TO LIVE WITH

Here's the text of a letter I've had to deliver to my upstairs neighbours:

Hello Robbie and friend,

Since my conversation in person a couple months ago seems to have been forgotten, I thought I’d drop you a line. Like you, and Jason below me, I work late into the night but, unlike the rest of you, I also work in the afternoon. I’m a busy guy, and one who likes and needs to sleep. Usually, it’s between 3:30 am and 10:30 am.

I say ‘usually’ because, on far too many occasions, I’m awakened at 8:30 or 9 in the morning by someone upstairs coming home and clomping around in heavy shoes. Sometimes – like yesterday morning – I’m awakened by loud construction projects going on upstairs. If I bang on the ceiling with a broom handle like I did yesterday and twice before, it’s because I’ve been rudely yanked out of sleep and am therefore very, very angry. Telling me to “fuck off” doesn’t solve anything, either.
Is this hard for you to understand?

I had an overnight guest two weekends ago who was woken up at 7:30 on a Sunday morning by the sound of sawing upstairs. Sawing! Somehow, I managed to sleep through that but I was embarrassed and angry on my friend’s behalf.

I’m not trying to tell you how to live, just how to show a little common courtesy to those around you. Believe it or not, I’m far more patient than most others would be.
I don’t complain about noise in the evening – it’s expected when you live in a building.
I don’t complain about your yappy little dog – I like yappy little dogs.
I don’t complain about your very loud country music – I just turn up my own stereo.
But I WILL complain about excessive noise from 3:30 am to 10:30 am – I’m just trying to sleep, right?
Think about that next time you pull out the saw and we’ll get along much better.

Too condescending? I sure hope so. The landlady got a copy and thought it was perfect, as she loathes these guys. My friend Tara is afraid a "noise war" will break out. Crossing my fingers...

Labels: friends