What's he on about now?

In case the articles, essays and opinions throughtout this site just weren't enough for you, here's my online diary (a.k.a. 'blog'). It's as close as you'll come to the inside of my head, so don't say I didn't warn you
(and remember, you can always e-mail me if you love or loathe anything you're about to read)...


   Monday, May 31, 2004

SLOUCHING TOWARDS VEGETARIANISM

I went to see the year's creepiest/funniest film this weekend: Morgan Spurlock's Super-Size Me, a documentary detailing the unpleasant effects of both his own one-month McDonald's-only diet and America's obsession with fast food. While Spurlock is certainly coming from the Michael Moore school of Complete and Utter Bias (why not less fries, more salads?), the results are still eerie. By as early as Day 21, Spurlock's high-fat diet had apparently done great harm to his liver and, in a tense scene, his physician all but begs him to stop his experiment immediately.

One of the funniest things in the movie is the arguments between Spurlock and his girlfriend, a vegan chef. Aside from a plug for her recipe-filled website, Healthy Chef Alex, the movie features scenes of her trying not only to get her boyfriend off the McDonald's but meat altogether. "Not gonna happen," he declares, launching into a pro-meat speech. "I'm sure heroin is pretty awesome too," she says. Spurlock laughs at her and jokes about being found "strung out on ham."

He's got a point. While I, for one, would love to be a vegetarian, I worry about getting enough protein and, yes, meat tastes really good. Having often replaced chicken with tofu in my own meals, I know that steering average people away from animal products is still a tall order. I've mostly avoided beef for the most part for a long time, though. I was never crazy about the texture, the fat, the blood, etc. Subsequently, the whole 'mad cow' business and the terrifying possiblility of a link to Alzheimer's disease have pushed me away even further. Nevertheless, I still find myself occasionallly ordering a Philly steak sandwich -- they're delicious!

Maybe the solution is simply better meat -- healthier, safer, better-monitored -- though this remains part of a larger problem: healthy is just not as profitable. "Super-Size Me" certainly uses McDonald's as an example and, in his infamous 1998 essay, "Shredding the Bill of Rights", Gore Vidal waxes nostagic:

"For those of us who grew up in pre-war United States there was the genuine ham sandwich. Since consolidation, ham has been so rubberized that it tastes of nothing at all while its texture is like rosy plastic. Why?"

Well, Gore, the organization GRACE (Global Resource Action Center for the Environment) has a terrific animated parody called The Meatrix that explains exactly why ham is now so inedible -- thanks to the current conditions in factory farms -- and offers links to other choices, like that pricey meat shop in my neighbourhood. So when I hear that Philly call, I'll cough up the dough for organic beef -- otherwise, it'll be supermarket tofu for me, thanks.

OK, I lied...supermarket chicken...

HOW CAN I BE A PROPER CURMUDGEON...

...when Terri keeps sending me thirty (!) baby pictures a week of her little Ryan? I try to scoff, I try to make some wisecrack about this being the most well-documented baby in human history, but then I look at the photos and, well, awwwwwwww! Gosh, he's cute -- even when his parents dress him up in a Disney T-shirt with matching army camouflage pants (don't get me started)!

MAN ON THE MOON BACK ON EARTH?

My friend Don e-mailed to ask me if I'd heard about the return of Andy Kaufman. A news story on Yahoo claims that Kaufman says "sorry about faking my death" from cancer in 1984 and now plans occasional public appearances.

I don't what to think -- celebrity stunt of the century or creepy fan hoax?

One wonders what Michael Stipe thinks of this but, judging from an interview with Andy's alter-ego Tony Clifton on the R.E.M. website, he's known about this since October.

Anyone else have a take on this?

WE'RE HERE, WE'RE QUEER, LEAVE US ALONE

A press release from the Fox TV network lets us know that the "current pop culture craze for all things gay is taken to an outrageously satirical extreme in this hilarious reality special. SERIOUSLY, DUDE, I'M GAY...airs Monday, June 7."

There.
My decision to get rid of television in my home now feels entirely necessary.

Maybe it's the law of diminishing returns -- I was thrilled by the arrival of "Will and Grace" and the British "Queer as Folk," skeptical but amused by "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" and the American "QAF", and somewhat put off by recent 'reality shows' "Boy Meets Boy" and "Getting It Straight."

For me, this Fox thing is pretty much the nail in the gay-TV coffin. Thank goodness for the alternately sweet and hostile relationship between Keith and David on "Six Feet Under" -- ironically, they're the only ones who seem like real people.

WHAT ELSE IS UP?

I spent last Wednesday having a well-deserved night off with James Anok, an old friend I don't see very often, and two pals of his at the new Drake Hotel, a super-swanky Queen West-West Art Deco restoration where all the wealthy media hipsters are hanging out for the next ten minutes. My favourite bit was James' new boyfriend whispering, "Look! It's that VJ from MuchMusic!" Ooooooh, somebody hold me. The crowd didn't impress me but the hotel did: drinks were surprisingly cheap, the empty brunch cafe looked inviting and the overall vibe was elegantly funky without trying too hard.

Meanwhile, I've been contemplating a severe hair cut. That sounds silly, I know, but I take my hair way too seriously and think a good old-fashioned buzz cut might be a solid, if temporary, cure.

Hey! I didn't see the final episode of 'Friends'! And I'm still breathing! Huh!

My friend and former roommate Josh had a birthday last week. His wife had a baby recently, as you may know, and he works very early in the morning so I of course mailed him a movie and a year's worth of X-Men comics because, well, he's earned the time off.

Speaking of which, I've accepted a truly bizarre offer: my mother and I each have a birthday falling in the last week of July so, this year, she's suggested that we take a road trip to Boston, a city I'm curious to visit. Travelling with my mother seems insane to me (as well as a bit sad, really) but she's so pleased by the notion and, secretly, I think it might help both of us continue to spackle over our messy history.

Let's see what happens...

Labels: comic books, friends

YIKES!

I realize with some alarm that it's been about three weeks since my last confession. Did I say 'confession'? I meant 'post'. Pretty well the same thing though, really.

My absence is certainly not due to having nothing to discuss. For one thing, there's those horrifying pictures out of Iraq. I thought "Passion of the Christ" was ugly but, man, seeing what's going on in those prisons (note the present tense!) made me ill.

And the worst part, as always, is that the Bush administration, as always, knew all about it. The Taguba report on conditions in US mercenary-run, privately-contracted prisons was submitted in final form on March 9, 2004. Over a week later, March 19th, National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice pops up on the CBS Early Show to praise George W.'s victories and declare, "There are no more rape rooms and torture chambers in Iraq."

Typical cover-up spin-doctoring but, horrors of horrors, images of the atrocities leaked past her and then, even as the story was finally starting to erupt all over the mainstream media weeks later, Bush repeated this silliness at his April 30th press conference:

"A year ago, I did give the speech from the carrier, saying that we had achieved an important objective, that we'd accomplished a mission, which was the removal of Saddam Hussein. And as a result, there are no longer torture chambers or rape rooms or mass graves in Iraq."

As "The Daily Show"'s Jon Stewart put it, "Well, they're not exactly closed...let's just say they're under new management."

It's all truly disgusting but then comes my favourite bit: Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, who knew about all of this before Bush or Rice, explains it all on May 4th:

"I'm not a lawyer. My impression is that what has been charged thus far is abuse, which I believe technically is different from torture...I don't know if it is correct to say what you just said, that torture has taken place, or that there's been a conviction for torture. And therefore I'm not going to address the torture word."

In a word: leadership.
Bush, by the way, announced this week that Rumsfeld is doing "a superb job."

I've been avoiding any link to more photos but I did find this terrific piece from the UK Observer on the origins of this entire sad story, as well as Jacob Weinstein's definitive character study of George W -- both of which destroy any notion that this was simply an aberration or, another favourite bit, just "a couple of bad apples." Just remember that you can't read and shake your head at the same time.

Labels: George W Bush