What's he on about now?

In case the articles, essays and opinions throughtout this site just weren't enough for you, here's my online diary (a.k.a. 'blog'). It's as close as you'll come to the inside of my head, so don't say I didn't warn you
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   Wednesday, March 29, 2006

   APOLOGIES ALL AROUND

I apologize to Christians.

While I hope you all understand that I make a broad distinction between ordinary, church-going folk (whose faith in a personal God I don't share but do respect) and the wide-eyed zealots who work tirelessly to bring about a glorious, fiery, bloody cleansing of the earth in time for the Rapture. There's a thick line between those groups but it's getting thinner all the time, so you'll have to forgive me for spouting off about it. Lines in the sand and all.

I apologize because I didn't realize that I and all the other liberal, news media, gay activist, Hollywood and leftist groups were causing enough pain to warrant today's two-day conference in Washington DC, "The War On Christians And The Values Voter in 2006." One of the panels is entitled, "'Christian Persecution: Reports From the Frontlines'...which will hear from those who've experienced anti-Christian bias first-hand." You'll hear harrowing tales of regular American people beaten in the streets, fired from their jobs, separated from the children by the courts, drummed out of the military, forbidden to marry and commanded to live in secret.

Oh wait...I'm confusing them with this guy. He apologized, too.

Still, the point remains because Christian conservatives only control the Prime Minister's office and the American White House, Congress, Senate, Supreme Court and Fox News -- a tiny base under constant threat from "Will & Grace." A mere 80 percent of Americans are Christian but fortunately, according to a recent University of Minnesota study, they're holding firm:

Americans rate atheists below Muslims, recent immigrants, gays and lesbians and other minority groups in “sharing their vision of American society.” Atheists are also the minority group most Americans are least willing to allow their children to marry...[The lead researcher said,] “It seems most Americans believe that diversity is fine, as long as every one shares a common ‘core’ of values that make them trustworthy -— and in America, that ‘core’ has historically been religious...Our findings seem to rest on a view of atheists as self-interested individuals who are not concerned with the common good.”

See? Now I owe Ralph Reed an apology -- he's all about the common good -- so I hereby end my participation in this ugly War on Christians.

I will no longer argue that gay and lesbian people deserve the same legal, cultural and human rights as everyone else; I will no longer argue that religion and science classes should be kept separate for the sake of both; I will no longer argue that there are WAY too many politicians using the phrase, "As a Christian..." for some kind of 'get-out-of-jail-free' card; I will no longer argue that people are capable of being moral, caring citizens of the world with also being religious.

Oh wait a minute...that's not a 'War'...that's free speech, one of the defining values of Western Judeo-Christian civilization. Everybody wins! So I'll keep on yapping, the victims of secular cruelty can proudly hold their conference and we'll all play nicely in the sandbox until John Lennon gets his way or the United Church of Christ does. I'll be happy either way and hey, no bullets needed.

Labels: religion