Catching Up

Faith lay back into the bed of the new apartment Wolfram and Hart had set her up in. Yeah, so her boss was a demon, she’d worked for worse things. She glanced up at the clock, 5:27, another hour before the Angel hunt began. Wolfram and Hart wanted her to do away with their rival, sad that a big powerful company couldn’t do it themselves. <Oh, well. Gives me a place to crash for a while. > After the Buffy-body-switching affair, she wasn’t gonna stay around for dear Buffy to try to bestow her with some more of her famous Buffy knowledge. She’d had enough of that crap. Sure, it had given her time to "reflect and grow," you know check back into the whole ‘my life is a complete failure and I’m a total screw-up’ thing. But she already knew that one. Just another brick in the wall as Pink Floyd would put it. No biggy…you move on, you party, heavily, and you’ll be fine. <That’s my philosophy. >

She turned over, grabbing the remote next to the bed and flipped on the television. Mindless crap always helped her clear, well actually erase, her thoughts. <Another hour until I get to kill Angel… Goody… But it would be so much better if I could send dear Buffy a tape…too bad. >

Cordelia dropped the phone and turned toward Angel, "You won’t believe what Giles just told me."

"Cordelia, if this is something about shoes or style of any kind, I would be eternally grateful if you could skip telling me and help with filing. You know, your job." Angel said in response as he started to enter his office.

"Faith’s awake, and she’s in LA." Cordelia said and glared, "And next time I hear about a huge sale at Bloomingdales, I just won’t tell you."

"Faith is here? But Cordelia," Angel reasoned, "If she was in LA, wouldn’t you have had a vision by now?"

"You know, Giles is kind enough to give us a heads up about the homicidal psycho bitch in our midst and the least you could do is…" She fell back against the wall and held her head in pain.

Angel dropped down next to her, "What did you see?"

"That the powers that be have an ironic sense of timing," Angel glared at her, "And Faith. Looks like our demon lawyer guys joined forces with our own cleavage-clad slut from Sunnydale U."

"Okay, I’m gonna go out and check all the standard Faith-magnet places, bars, clubs, locations around them." Angel pulled on his coat, "Then I’ll bring her back, chain her… and that’s where my plan kind of…ends."

"May I suggest, oh I don’t know, killing her." Cordelia piped in.

"I somehow don’t see that happening," Faith stepped through the office door and walked in confidently, "Hello Angel."

"Faith," He replied.

"And, oh look, jailbait decided to come," She turned to Cordelia and then saw Wesley enter the room, "And the ex-watcher too. Wow, this is like a bad family reunion. Well, without Buffy. Who I hear is getting along quite well with her new little lover. Sorry, Angel, she’s climbing someone else now. But I’m sure she’s thinking of you when she screams out ‘Riley’." She chuckled. "So, guys. Did you miss me?"

"Not really," Cordelia shrugged, "You know, master bitches like yourself aren’t generally missed."

Faith put her hand to her chest and made a mock pained expression, "Oh, that hurt," She found a chair and sat, "So, my boss tells me, you’re a detective now. The fanged private eye. Classic, really, I mean it. And let’s see, Cordelia’s a seer, some kind of vision thing that you have going on, right and Wesley’s dead weight, no huge surprise there. And, what else?" She held scrunched her eyebrows in feigned thought, "Oh yes, you’re the thorn in my boss’ side, so, he wants you dead." She stood up, "I think I’ve covered everything, basic synopsis, prose, liner notes, all that good stuff. Are there any questions?"

"Do you honestly think you’re going to kill me," Angel chuckled.

"Well, let’s see…" Faith thought, "I’m gonna go with, yes.. You wanna know why, because I almost have multiple times. But you wanna know what stopped me? You’re scrawny-ass girlfriend. But, she’s not here." She put her hand across her forehead in forged drama, "So, I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say. I’m. Going. To. Kill. You." She smiled, "But you know, I’ll let you chain me first. You know, just for fun." She stood for a moment and charged at Angel, back handing him and kicking him full force in the side. She kneed him from behind and punched him again in the face. Angel whirled around and backhanded her as she high side kicked him to the ground. Angel returned with a front roll to control his fall and used the momentum to return to his feet.

"It just occurred to me that we should probably do something," Cordelia turned to Wesley.

"Like what?" He was slowly backing further from the fighting couple.

"Grab her." Cordelia yelled.

"Oh, right." He and Cordelia positioned themselves behind Faith and pulled her back on both shoulders. Faith flailed for a while then accepted she was caught when Angel pulled her down into a chair, shackling her.

"Maybe we should put her downstairs," Cordelia said, "She’ll frighten the clients." Faith glared at her and mouthed ‘I am so going to kill you.’

"Good point," Angel said, "Plus, she could get out being just up here. I have stronger chains in my bedroom."

"Should I be comforted by that?" Cordelia asked.

"Just help me take her down." Angel quickly undid the shackle attached to the chair and barely avoided Faith’s leg as she kicked up to try to escape. He carried her from the chair, squeezing the bundle of nerves at back of her neck to keep her from trying to escape. He and Cordelia forced her onto the bed and chained her legs and arms to the posts.

"You know," Faith finally spoke, "You’ve tied me up twice, one of these days you’ll have to do something about it." She smiled as Angel gave her a glare; she puckered her lips in an air kiss and writhed seductively, giggling at his expression. ‘Mostly I just want you to wriggle’ she mouthed to him, recalling one of their last experiences.

"Want me to take care of super bitch?" Cordelia asked Angel.

"Yeah, I have to handle this case," He said as he entered the elevator they’d taken down to his basement apartment and added, "I’m going to talk to Kate with this one, she may be able to help."

Faith watched the elevator ascend the shaft and then met eyes with Cordelia, "Well, the things you miss." She chuckled, "That coma really had me out of quite a bit didn’t it? Not only has Buffy moved onto a new boy toy, Angel getting in between another pair of legs. Timeless." She smiled and relaxed in her chains, no point in fighting them, and tormenting little Cordy wasn’t a horrible distraction.

"Angel isn’t even close to getting in between… god, never mind! He’s not with Kate." Cordelia found a chair and sat across from where Faith lay.

"He isn’t, really," Faith shrugged, "Too bad. He’s a good one, really has that power thing going on between him. So Cordy, catch me up. I mean, I’ve been out for eight months, illuminate me." Cordelia leaned back, no point in avoiding any questions, <Faith’s chained, what can she do. >

"Well," She began, "Angel and Buffy broke…"

"Ahh, yes, little cry-Buffy." Faith interrupted.

"One thing we agree on," She continued, "He moved to LA, and then he met Doyle," Her voice hit an emotional high note. <A weak spot, this I can use. > "Doyle was half-demon and he had this vision power. The Powers that Be sent him messages of people in trouble, that’s how we know our cases. Anyway, Doyle died, in a heroic way, redeeming himself or something. The oracles accepted it and now I guess he’s in heaven or whatever. When Doyle died, he passed on the seeing-vision thing to me. And then Wesley came and now we’re a group."

Faith suppressed a smile, Cordelia was going soft, <God, how much I miss. I love it. > "So what’s the deal with Angel’s little slut?"

"Buffy"

"Close," She smiled, "But I mean Katy girl, who is she?"

"She’s cop-lady," Cordelia replied, "She’s actually kind of a bitch nutcase."

"I like her already," Faith said.

"You would." Cordelia stood up, "I’m gonna get a glass a water, you want?"

"Figure you should keep me alive?" Faith teased, "Sure." Cordelia nodded and went into Angel’s kitchen. Faith watched her leave and started to tug on her restraints, testing for a weak spot. She quickly found one, <That’s the trouble with Angel, never gets new chains. You never know when a crazy chick will break in.> She undid the chains and propped them up so it looked like they were still intact so Cordelia wouldn’t suspect anything.

Cordelia entered with two glasses of water and set them down, sliding back into the chair. "So," she said and sipped, "What have you been up to?"

"Let’s see," Faith said, "Spent eight months on a hospital bed in coma, that was fun. Then I woke up, reeked havoc on Sunnydale, switched bodies with Buffy, fucked her boyfriend, and then came back. And from what I can tell, it’ll be fun from here on in." She slipped out of her restraints and punched Cordelia, successfully knocking her out. "You have no idea how fun."

Faith cocked her head, smiling for a moment. Then she pulled Cordelia from the ground and hooked her into the chains, "Now, let’s have some fun with Wesley." She smiled.

"Kate found a lead," Angel yelled into the office as he entered, slamming the door behind him. He hung his coat up before actually realizing that the office was completely empty.

"Cordelia," Angel called, "Wesley?" Angel furrowed his brow and remembered Faith. <They must be down with her. > He said to himself and pressed the button to recall the elevator.

"Hello again," Faith said as she hit him over the head with the battle-ax that he previously displayed in the front window. "You really need to replace those chains." She let the ax fall and clang to the hard wood floor. She kneeled down and pulled him up onto a chair; retrieving the chord she found in a utility chest and tied him onto the chair. She pulled another chair in front of his, waiting for him to come to, she hadn’t hit him hard enough to keep him down that long.

After a few minutes, his eyes slowly rolled up as he regained consciousness. She leaned down onto the palms of her hands that rested on her knees. His vision cleared as he realized he was tied down. He strained in them, making the chair creak under its force. She smiled at his stubborn (but anal) persistence.

"They won’t break." She said as she watch him continue to struggle, "Listen, the chains were fun, kinky and all that. But you know, time’s being wasted, and I’ve got to kill you."

"You don’t have to do this, Faith," Angel said, "We can help you."

"You know, Hun," She stood and turned her chair so its back faced him, "As much as I love your little ‘you can get better’ pep talks, spare me. Actually, the way I figure it, you should be jumping in my boat."

"Oh really," He scowled, "And why is that?"

"Think about it," She said, "Buffy forgot you too. We’re in the same situation here, and she just forgot to return to port. She forgot me, you, all the people she ‘loved.’" His expression turned somber, the brooding, detachment facial cast of which he was a practiced. "But you didn’t forget her did you?" She chuckled and sat across his lap, "You didn’t. Of course, I mean. I know you; Mr. Never let anything go. Well, Angel, I’ve got to tell you a little secret." She set her lips next to his ear and whispered, "She was riding Riley long before I woke up."

"Bitch." He said through clenched teeth.

She moved back, giving him full view of her mocking gasp, "You slash me. Bitch, whore, slut, tramp, been there, done that, no big deal. Although, honestly, the same could be said for your chaste little Buffy. Her holier than thou routine doesn’t work anymore. You know, college will do that to you. I mean, sure, she couldn’t screw you because of the soul thing. But now, she’s found herself a little Iowa sweetie to nuzzle close to, wile away the dull hours, take her mind off you." He strained in the ties again making her laugh and whisper, "Oh, do it again."

"I was wrong Faith." He said.

"What about," She asked, steeling herself for another ‘you can get better’ speech.

"We should have stopped trying on you long before now." He glared up at her; "You didn’t deserve our time."

She backed off of him, silently surprised by his statement. She wasn’t sure if it was hatred or hurt that filled her. An unusual clench enveloped her chest, anger, perhaps. All she knew was, she wanted him dead, right now.

"Yeah, you should have." Faith said dangerously low. She stood up and went into one of the file cabinets, where she knew a stake would be and drew it open, slowly lifting the wooden stave. "Last chance Angel. You can die, or, well actually, forget the or. Because, I really want you dead."

"Faith, it doesn’t have to be like this." Angel said, a solemn, but desperate plea.

"No Angel," She look at her weapon, then back at him, "It has to be exactly this way." She moved to ready the stake, but it was quickly knocked out of her hand, though she couldn’t see who was responsible, because, with a blow, she too was knocked out.

"Not so fast Faith," Buffy’s voice mouthed.

THE END