The River,
by Dr. George.
Ah, Agent Lemon. I always think "Shit, this doesn't look like enough,
maybe I screwed up the extraction." Then I drink it, and there's no doubts
left in my mind about whether or not it was enough.
Me and TC bought two boxes of cough syrup (750 mg of dxm each) and
extracted it - we planned to save a quarter of it for another guy, and
then split the rest. Unfortunately, while dividing up the finished
product, I knocked over a glass and spilled half of it. Oh well, I
dumped the other guy's stuff into mine. We mixed it with cranberry juice,
downed it, and headed out.
We headed up towards a local elementary/junior high school (it was
Saturday.) It took about a half hour to walk to it, and when we got there
I was just starting to feel the DXM. We went to the playground and got
into a red plastic tube, where we smoked up. Because of the red tint of
anything inside the tube, the joint was burning yellow. Weird.
We finished that, re-rolled the roach, smoked it, then climbed out. I
realized something. "Oh my god!" I yelled. "What?" "I just notice -
this playground is the first I've ever seen without ANY SWINGS!" TC
looked startled. He pointed at a little motorcycle-on-a-spring for the
kids to ride and announced: "Quick! That!" I ran over and climbed on it,
and started rocking back and forth, talking about hunting down the missing
swings. Then he ran up and jump-kicked me. I KNEW it hurt, I could feel it...
but it felt like I was just imagining the pain.
Shit. What was that? I turned around - a little kid, and his mother!
I ran. "Where are you going?" asked TC. "Shit, dude, there's motherfuckers
coming!"
"What?"
"Motherfuckers! They're coming!"
"What?"
"Motherfuckers! Over there!"
"What?"
"There's fucking people coming!"
He hopped down and we ran. Well, we tried to... either we were running
really slowly, or I was really messed up. Eventually we stopped and
decided to head up to a convenience store to get some stuff to deal with
the cotton mouth and munchies. About a block from the main street, we spot
a cop car. Okay, not going there. We head up a block, then try again - the
cop passes right past us. Ick.
At some point, life went from a cartoon to a comic book.
"Wait, how are my eyes?"
I look. TC has the worst case of redeye I've ever seen. I probably do
too. I pull out the Visine and he lies down on the grass to let me put it
in. We wait for a minute, then head across the street to the store.
When we enter, I see all the people inside, and think "All these people's
normal lives are about to be invaded and interrupted by us two freaks." I
like that. Bottle of water, counter, money, it's all pretty hard to
do. The lady next to me is talking about the lottery. It scares me.
When we leave, TC tells me that he knocked over a shelf of books, but the
cashier didn't notice. I didn't either.
We pass Dairy Queen. He says he wants some ice cream, I tell him to go
buy some, he says "No, I can't buy on high." Okay, whatever. We sit on a
bench that is slightly on a hill. He asks a question, and I say "Sorry, I
can't deal with that right now, I'm falling through time." I felt like I
was somersaulting backwards off the bench, but I wasn't moving - so if I
was moving, but not through space, I must be moving through time. TC grabs
me suddenly and hisses "Look out!" I look at him, and he tells me that he
thought the car parked in front of us was driving at us. Best be moving on,
I think.
We go up to a park. About 10 seconds in, he collapses onto the
ground. After some persuading, he gets back up, and we keep walking. I
feel like I'm in a Group of Seven painting. We pass by an old man in a
jacket, and TC decides that he's a cop. We run into a little auditorium
kind of thing where plays are performed, and scout from the top until the
old man leaves. Then we head to a skiing/snowboarding hill, and roll down.
Really, really, really, really, really disorienting. Really. Shit, we're
covered in mud. We find a patch of snow and roll in it to try to clean
ourselves up. Then we head down into a ravine and wander around, looking
for "the bridge."
We come to a bridge eventually, and cross it. The path on the other side
comes to an abrupt end at a tall fence with a "No Trespassing" sign. Two
guys are on the other side, with a dog. They come through a hole in the
fence, and we go through it too. We cross a golf course, climb a hill,
run away from a man who isn't chasing us, and cross another bridge. We
come underneath a highway bridge. Construction has been going on on it,
but all the machines are quiet. It's a very bizarre sight, an empty
construction site - the way everything is just left where it was when
the day ended. It's like everyone suddenly walked away from what they
were doing. The pillars of the bridge are coated in ice. It's beautiful,
but also terrifyingly dangerous should any fall on us.
In front of us is a river. We need to cross it. There's a rock bed in
the middle, which we get to.. but now we can't get to the other
side. Well, if there aren't any stepping stones, we'll build some! We
pull up rocks and throw them into the river. We manage to balance on them
somehow, and get to the other side with only slightly wet shoes. We walk
up to the bridge again, and TC spots something - there's a bridge across
the river right there. God dammit. Oh well - we walk up along a path towards
the top of the ravine.
There's a total gap in my memory right about here.
We were up on the road now, tired and hungry. We sit down for a minute,
then get up and go in search of food. A restaurant... I ask TC what he
thinks, and he says it's a bad idea. We wouldn't've been able to read
the menu, let alone order or pay. We go to a convenience store instead.
Pringles!
We go to a nearby subway station, ride the subway around to my station,
and get out. We start heading back to my place, cut through my school
property. TC tries to break in.
Another gap in my memory.
Come home, pretty sobered up by now. Just a slight hangover - my eyes feel
weird.