I Don't Like Scary Movies ...

If you know Central Ontario at all, you know that winter means snow, and lots of it. Well this year was no different. The local weather forecaster, with a subtle hint of fiendish delight in his voice, was always calling for 10-15 centimeters of the "fluffy white stuff."

On Saturday morning, Ms. Lucy went out, once again, to shovel the driveway. It was a blustery cold morning and she muttered to herself, "This is not good for man or beast." What she did not know is that her neighbor Margarita was walking her precious little dog, Bernie, with his new leash.

Margarita is known for doing things the right way but she had no choice with this one. Little Bernie needed some new warm doggie socks and the only cheque to arrive by mail this week was the baby bonus. Surely, she couldn't wait until next week to buy the doggie socks! Who would want poor little Bernie to go outside in knee-deep snow with those old doggie socks?

Ms. Lucy was already shoveling for about fifteen minutes and she was only half way down the driveway. The snow bank was so high that she could not see over it. The snow was heavy and she kept asking herself, "Why is Buddy inside making breakfast in the warm kitchen while I'm out here shoveling the white fluffy stuff?"

That was when she tried to lift the shovel and it would not move. It was too heavy. She mustered up all her strength and gave it the big heave ho. The shovel went up, slipped out of her frozen hands and sailed over the snow bank.

Unknown to Ms. Lucy, it fell only a few inches in front of poor little Bernie and scared the living daylights out of him. He scampered about in every direction at once. That shovel of the "white fluffy stuff" was more than twice the size of little Bernie. Fortunately, it fell in front of him and not on him.

Ms. Lucy peeked around the snow bank in time to see little Bernie run around Margarita's feet. She tried to pick him up but he excitedly ran around her again and his leash tightened around her feet. That was when Ms. Lucy saw Margarita fall head first into the snow bank.

It was not a pretty sight! Her long skirt flew over her body and her bare legs kicked back and forth. Thinking quickly, Ms. Lucy rushed over, picked up the shovel, threw it over the snow bank and then helped Margarita to her feet. "Where are you going on this cold morning", she asked politely.

"I was taking little Bernie for a walk and as we were approaching your driveway, a shovel came sailing through the air."

"A shovel! That's strange! I don't see any shovel! Are you sure it was a shovel?"

"Well, it looked like a shovel to me but I don't see it now. What are you doing out on a morning like this?"

"I was on my way to your house. Buddy and I would like to have you over to watch a movie tonight. Will you join us?"

"Sure, why not? Just make sure that Buddy doesn't get a scary movie. You know how I hate those scary movies."

"Don't worry! Buddy promised to get a nice family movie so that the kids could watch it with us. Bye for now. See you later."

On the way home Margarita said, "I feel sure it was a shovel but how could I explain a 'flying shovel' that almost landed on little Bernie and then disappeared?" No one would believe that story."

Ms. Lucy hurried inside, closed the door and tried breathlessly to explain everything to Buddy. When she stopped to catch her breath, Buddy exclaimed, "Too bad!"

"Too bad what, Mr. Meuillar?"
"Too bad the shovel didn't fall on Margarita."

"You be nice to her Buddy Meuillar. She is a good neighbor and you know it. Be sure to get a good family movie for tonight. Margarita is coming over and I already told her that YOU want her to come over to watch a movie."

After breakfast, the Meuillars headed out for their regular Saturday morning grocery "hopping" exercise. Yes, they go through the flyers looking for the specials then go from store to store and buy large quantities of the items on sale. This usually ends with lunch at one of their favorite local restaurants.

Shortly before 7:30 that night, Buddy was trying to tape one of his favorite radio programs when the doorbell rang. "Who could that be?" he asked. "It might by Margarita", said Ms. Lucy.

"Oh no! I forgot to get the movie." Buddy grabbed his coat and rushed through the laundry room to the garage while Ms. Lucy opened the front door. "Please come in Margarita. Let me take your coat and we'll sit by the fire while Buddy gets the movie."

"Is he just going for the movie? That lazy Buddy! I mean that busy Buddy!"

"Don't worry about it Margarita, let's sit by the fire. He'll be back in a jiffy. As you know, the movie store is only a hop, skip and a jump away."

"What will we do while we wait for Buddy? I know. We could play that neat game I saw it on TV today. We just sit around and say things about someone who is not in the room."

"Isn't that called gossiping?" asked little Kimmy.

"Yes! I mean no! In this game we only say NICE things about the person. Since your father is going to get the movie, we could all say nice things about him. This should be good," she muttered softly.

"I know nice things about my daddy! Count me in," said Kimmy. "Me too," said Norm. "I'm ready," said Syl. "Don't start without me," shouted Ms. Lucy from the kitchen where she was brewing some tea.

After Ms. Lucy served the tea, she asked, "Who'll go first?"

"Me. Me" shouted little Kimmy. "I'll go first! My daddy can do anything. He's my fix-it-dad. Only yesterday, he fixed Barbie's broken shoe. My daddy knows everything, he is the smartest daddy in the whole wide world."

"I don't know," countered Norm. "He doesn't quite know everything. He grew up in the old days when things were different. Sometimes he does not even remember his childhood and he is so old-fashioned. Some of his ideas are hopelessly out-of-date."

"Now, now Norm, he is not that bad. When I was your age, I also thought that he was old-fashioned and out-of-date but he does know a little bit about everything.

He has a lot of experience because he has been around much longer than any of us. He helped me get my first job. I did not even know how to write a resume. He also helped me open my first bank account and file my first tax return. These days, I don't do anything until I talk to dad."

"Your big brother is right Norm. Your dad is a smart man. He knows about many things and does them for us before we ask him."

"Things like what mom?"

"Did you apply for your own passport or get your own ticket for that trip to Jamaica?"

"No! Children don't know anything about applying for a passport. I just did the important things. I packed my swimming trunks, my sunshades and the suntan lotion."

"My point exactly Norm. Your dad did those things and much more for you and the rest of us and we did not even have to ask him to do it."

"You are right mom. He is a good dad. The best!"

The door opened and they all heard Buddy's reflective voice singing, "If I were a Rich Man."

"Margarita, he's back and you did not get a chance to say anything."

With an impish smile Margarita said, "That's OK Ms. Lucy. As you know, I've always said that he's a little eccentric. That's my story and I'm sticking to it."

After the movie, Ms. Lucy helped Margarita with her coat and Buddy settled into his favorite chair to listen to the radio program he taped. It started with, "Is he just going for the movie? That lazy Buddy! I mean that busy Buddy!"

On hearing Margarita's fidgety voice, Buddy fell off his chair with a loud thud. Ms. Lucy rushed to his aid as he languidly asked, "What is she doing on my favorite radio program?"