The noble deed is now crystal clear.  My noble deed is to open my heart and love the world as it is.  How have I arrived at this conclusion.  Perhaps as best as I can I will present the journey and the mission that has taken me thus far.

In the beginning came the realization that to return to the beliefs of my youth was no more possible to me than to return to my mother’s womb.  For now the road has taken me beyond the safe terrain of faith out into a world beyond belief.   Although I long to reenter the Garden of my childhood faith, I have eaten of the fruit of knowledge and have lived and seen too much of the world to be able to live within the realm of conventional spiritual belief.
       And yet, I long to experience the divine, to have a relationship with god, to be inspired with spirit.  I would that I had a lord and saviour.  However, the truth of my life is that I need to move on.  To find the courage and the hope that it is possible to move through the emptiness of meaningless existence to a reality that will satisfy my needs. and at the same time be true to the integrity that my life journey has given me..
      The task for myself it to create, imagine, find, be open to another way to access  that energy or consciousness that many call god or spirit, that I prefer to call mystery.
      How to connect with this Mysterium? I sense that I need a means that comes forward from my cynical world view, which in truth I confess has faded into a somewhat accepting openness to life that hints at a threshold to the Other.
     What I long for is a channel that opens onto spirit or Mysterium.  It needs to include my view of humans and human situation.  (Humans in my experience seem to be driven by forces that take them over such as violence, genicide, warfare. One other force is the consuming drive of sex.  And not to be forgotten: that which can best be described as human stupidity, although I confess I like the term human folly better.)     In some personal way, that channel for me will be 'the noble deed' that will make my life worth the struggle.
       My noble deed is to shape a consciousness that will give me a context for my life that is worthy of who I am.  My resolve is simple even if perhaps impossible to achieve.  I know I am capable of growing to love my fellow being, or more exactly, I can extend a sense of compassion to all whom I meet.  Compassion seems like the most human of all virtues. Arising within anyone has lived long enough to realize what a weary, desperate, unhappy world we share, it is easy toreach out to another who shares the world with you, and say to them, “Yes, I know.” 
      To learn to love another, to be honest and just,  to contribute to the community and society all seem part of becoming human.  However as we all know it is an almost impossible task for several reasons.  In rather simplicistic terms humanity seems to be governed, by its brain, its genitals and its heart.  The heart seems the one center which has yet to be opened or developed.  The evolution of the heart would set the world on its head.  To share, to cooperate, to rule in a way that helps others rather than aggrandise one’s self or nation would be the way of the heart.
         Individually of course we love a few others in our lives.  it is in a limited degree and depended on one’s capacity to love and one’s creativity and skill in loving.  We can acknowledge that this is a limited form, almost a precursor, of the greater love.  And we might be tempted to despair if more is possible.  However something occurring presently in my life gives me pause that this might be about to change.  
        Personally  I have recently become aware of a rather strange and stirring phenomenal in which my own heart seems to open up and is capable of emitting an energy that I think of as love energy.   I have witnessed with some degree of incredulity its impact on people I meet.  Being of a certain age (three score and ten), I wonder if this love energy-- the kind that is necessary for the task at hand -- awakens at a certain age, just as sexual energy awakens at a certain age.  My personal experience over the last while has led me to believe in such a possibilty. 
        Certainly the world at this moment in history is in a very troubled place.  How to move forward from here, how to get ourselves out ot the mess we have landed in is the task at hand.   I am adamantly resolved to make of my moment in history a worthy contribution to this speculation. 
         Some grand gesture this dark moment is called for.  In a world so angry and fearful what would be a grand gesture?  An evolutionary step forward, coming at a moment of absolute necessity, would be the awakening of the human heart. 

        ( To look at a story that offers such a possibility go to The Last one at 
                   http://webhome.idirect.com/~thepilgrim/thelastone.html )
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Some random myth making, which might or might not be an afterthought of the above.
 

Ulyssian/Michael Chronicles ( undated, probably sometime during 2003)

"I am an old warrior of great strength and power.  Having fought my battles I roam the world, not so much like a knight errant seeking to right wrongs, rescue fair maidens or protect the weak, but I seek out the places of power, the people who can be trusted.  I travel to empower, to enrich the world.  I seek moments and events that will transform time and history.
        "I am Michael, the archangel,  returned to earth with a new mission given me by Divinity.  My mission as best that I can articulate it to you is to shift the human sense of itself.  As once I was called to fight against my brother, Lucifer, and remove him from heaven, it is now my mission to bring him back to the table of angels, and give to him the respect and the honour that is rightfully his.
       "I am not alone, but have many brothers and sisters who await but the call, to  awaken from their long sleep. 
       "And I am Ulysses, the brave and cunning human,who has traveled the world, fought with gods, and with angels, such as you, Michael, the archangel.  For endless lifetimes have I lived, crossing countless seas, enduring storms, and demons, and now full with experience and with life, I am he who you seek  Lucifer, incarnated in man.   I am become as the deepest part of all that which is human and perverse.  And my mission is to take you into the tavern of men and have you sing and drink that you may know our sorrow, our grief, and our dignity of humanity.   For now we are one and the same.
         "So let us begin.  On this day, the 14 day of the tenth month of the calendar year,  we set out to.  It is enough for this day that we declare ourselves and our misssion - to embrace all that is human."

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