Instant Furniture

by Peter S. Stamberg

"Instant furniture? Easy - all you need is precut wood, glue, and finishing nails. And not only is it simple, quick to make, and unbelievably inexpensive - what you end up with is the best of 20th century design...

"...These are truly breathtaking designs - an unbelievable combination of museum-quality style and low-budget simplicity. Craftsmen, homemakers, consumers, businessmen, and even children will delight in making these sturdy, useful pieces, and students and professionals in the field will find them equally appealing and worthy of study."

Okay, I'll admit I was initially sold on the hyperbolic bumph*, but having just finished making the "Shmata #1", one of the easier armchair designs, I've got to hand it to Mr. Stamberg ["one of the most promising architectural and furniture designers on the contemporary scene", by the way, 'contemporary' meaning 1976] - it's a fine-looking little chair. I wouldn't describe it as 'breathtaking', exactly, nor even really 'comfortable', but on the whole I must say that I am a satisfied consumer, and that Mr. Stamberg is a fine young man and a crackerjack designer.

The chair looks like it's built out of wooden scaffolding. I painted it bright orange, and upholstered it in lumpy blue fun-fur cushions. I'm going to give it to my friend Jonathan as a late birthday present, since he's moving into a bigger apartment and might have room for it, unlike me. By the way, if you're reading this and you're Jonathan, forget you saw it and just act surprised when I show you the chair, okay? And delighted, if possible.

*I just looked up 'bumph' to see if I was spelling it right, and discovered that it started off as a short form of 'bum-fodder', which is British slang for toilet paper. Did you know that? I didn't. I love the dictionary.